Tor Hershman

Final Post

2011-08-31T13:05:00.000-07:00

The unjust apes have won, just as I expected.

Goodbye and as all-times.....

Kristallbrunch (The Brunch-Time of Broken Glass)

2011-08-08T05:30:00.000-07:00

If you're new here you may wish to read the July 3rd posting firstly.

----------------------------------------
UPDATE: August 31, 2011
I done thunk-up a new quote this day and
it goes like this

"The Truth is always prepared for justice
&
Wisdom is always prepared for injustice."

-------------------------------
UPDATE:
Come See The WITCH HUNT

Wendesday – August 31st, 2011
11:30 A.M.
@
The Ohio County Magistrate Court
26 - 15th St.
Courthouse Annex
Wheeling, West Virginia

Yes, old Tor is gonna be Galileo-ed !

On Thursday, the 25th, Mrs. H. and moi ‘twere sittin' on the porch when a blue uniform came around the corner, stopping at the porch gate.
We both, geezerly, leapt to our feet and fled inside.
I spoke with the Sheriff’s officer through the,
top part (screen) of the
[once glass bottom before the WPD smashed it in]
storm door.
I was given a Civil Summons for Wrongful Occupation
made out to a “Mr. Hersman.”

So, on Friday I spent most of the day rapidly walkin’ betwixt library, courthouse annex and post office delivering legal replies.
The one lady, who took my response and counterclaim, at the CH annex had never viewed soooooooooo many papers in a response and had to ask another lady if they all should be included. The other lady said, “Yes.”

Amusingly enough, there was only one magistrate on duty on Friday so I had to wait a couple of hours to deliver papers that took five minutes to drop-off.
Now, I had NO intention of recheckin’ my paper work
HOWEVER after being there quite a while I reread them.
YIKES!
I had left-out one of the key papers.
Moi returned home and added said paper.

Most truthfully, as I was sitting in the waiting area the lady guard and another lady were talking. Methinks some of it may have been for moi’s, hardly benefit, but interest.
The ‘I was a police officer for 25 and half years’ lady guard said to me
“I can’t talk to anyone who’s wearing sunglasses.”
So as a courtesy...I removed me shades.
Then, at conversations end, I started putting them back on.
She said, in a somewhat police-y manner
“Why don’t you leave them off?”
To which moi retorted
“Because I like them on,” as they went over me eyes
&
IF LOOKS COULD split your head open I’d of been down and out right then; the nightsticks, figuratively speaking, FLEW outta her eyes – only for a moment – but OH how they DID fly for a second.
I pretty much got the same visual ‘e eye’ from
almost everyone at the annex.
Moi ain’t surprised.

Sooooooo
If you missed Socrates' trial,
couldn’t make it to Galileo’s trial,
didn't see the trial & burning of Giordano Bruno,
DON’T MISS
TOR ON TRIAL!
Friend and Foes alike should be greatly amused by the
“Proceedings.”

Sponsored by an Inquisition...
...hear ye...near ye.

Oh yeah, on Thursday I called the Ohio Attorney General’s office to discover what they thought about there being a business,
River Towne Limited, Inc.,
listed in Ohio County, WV as an “Ohio corporation” but there are no records of in Ohio. I was told it was not under the Ohio AG’s office authority and I should call the Ohio Secretary Of State’s office, which moi done did. The Ohio SOS office told me it was not under the Ohio SOS’ authority and I should call the Ohio AG’s office. I told the SOS that I just DID speak with the AG’s office and they told moi to call the SOS and guess what I got...
I got the
but but but but but
but but but but
but but but
but but
but
human moterboat song and dance.

That same day when I, again, called the WV AG and SOS offices about a property
(That’s right, River Towne Limited, Inc.)
that the state of WV took over for taxes in 2007 and there is NO record of, guess what...I got the ‘But But But’ song and dance, AGAIN.

Oh yes, as I rode the bus back from Kroger this day (Aug. 27, 11) two sheriff’s vehicles,
[I'm sure there's no record of the stop]
directly in front of the bus, pulled over and stopped in the
right-hand lane under the OVMC overpass and an officer jumped-out into the lane the bus was in and looked directly into the bus.
I got a fair shot of adrenaline.
The officers SEEMED to be having a problem with some folks at the bus stop.
Then I stated loudly,”Well, at least they weren’t there to assassinate me but my heart rate did go up a little.”
Of course, that’s if you’re using ‘a little’ as understatement.

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

-------------------------------
UPDATE: August 19, 2011
New information, I just learned yesterday,
leads me to conclude that much of this horrid situation
could be from the prosecution of a
(NOT a Catholic but a member of a large church)
sodomizing child molester of little children.
The Judge firstly set the bail at $20,000
then $400,000
and now, as I understand it, has denied bail.
I was speechless.
I’ll write more when/if I can.

[August, 20 - The bail is $400,000]
----------------------------
UPDATE: August 24, 2011
Yesterday I discovered that about
two years ago a wee child made accustations
of sexual misconduct against Nance
BUT
the police did not believe her and DID believe Nance.

To protect and serve.....
.....whom ?

----------------------------
I just got this and this would make it, I surmise, an interstate criminal conspiracy ...
------------------------
[UPDATE: August, 24, 2011 -
Name removed [NR] from blog,
by request of "Motive Force,"
BUT
available to any government agency upon
proof of said agency’s proper interest.]

NR, 81, was arrested and booked into Davis County Jail on a warrant for sexually assaulting a child.

Nance was booked into the jail Thursday morning on suspicion of committing three counts of rape of a child, the aggravated sexual abuse of a child and one count of sodomy upon a child.

The 2nd District Court in Farmington had issued warrants for his arrest on the three rape counts on Tuesday on behalf of the Syracuse Police Department. According to court documents, the offenses occurred on March 26, 1995.
[UPDATE: also 2011 & others]
His bail is set at more than $400,000.
-------------------------
I will not tell you, now, of how
the arrest of Nance and
myself are connected BUT it IS most directly.

As I told the person who was the
motive force in the original arrest,
“Don’t be surprised if anyone that
well connected [Nance] with the Mormon Church
only gets 100 hours of community service
AT
the Little Girls Shelter.”

There were two arrests,
original one with the bail being set at $20,000
and then more
people came forth with charges against Nance
and the judge raised bail to 400k.

I just realized something, it isn’t the Catholics
nor Protestants nor Jews nor Muslims nor Atheists
...the Catholics are getting all the heat about it
BUT IT IS...
the Child Molesters –
the Jewish Child Molesters –
the Atheist Child Molesters –
the Mormon Child Molesters –
the Catholic Child Molesters -
the Muslim Child Molesters.

It’s the Child Molesters against the rest
of us AND they use religion as a smokescreen.
What matters most to a Child Molester
is NOT Jesus or Mohammed or Jehovah or Darwin.....
what matters MOST to them is molesting children.

I'm so sorry,
I've been very hard only on the Catholics about this...
sorry.

Maybe we should protect the children
THEN
we can beat each other to
death over whose who's is best
but
in the mean(most mean)time
the child molesters are LOL @ us all.

-------------------------

UPDATE: August 15, 2011
Two weeks ago the
WV Secretary of State's office
(304-558-6000)
had records of a company named
Rivertowne Limited, Inc.
today
they did NOT
BUT
Ohio County still does, this day,
and now so does moi.
I'm too busy to go in detail now
but
guess how much Klos sold this
14 apartments place for,
go on...guess.
$10.00
that's right
TEN Dollars
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10
Add Sesame Street Count LOL here
10 HAHAHA!
dollars.
That's just a single snowflake on the tip
of the iceberg.

I'd a-paid $11.35.
------------------------------

[Personal Information Removed from this bolg post that was in official WPD complaint & others – PIR]
____________________
I, [PIR] “Tor” Hershman, and my wife, [PIR], were in our apartment on Wednesday, August 3rd, 2011 [PIR] when at approximately 10:25 AM we hear a knock at the front door. There is no law that requires a person, unless it’s the police with a search warrant, to answer a door knock and we did not. It sounded as if the person on the porch left at about 10:28. AM
At approximately 10:30 AM there were more sounds from the porch followed by loud knocking then loud pounding. A voice said “Mr. Hershman, Mr. Hershman, we need to get in to bug spray.” I was almost ready to open the door till I heard that and with the threats already made by Rick W. Mercer I knew that was an untruth.
We stay inside and do nothing but be on guard. Then the pounding increases with a huge crashing of broken glass. I heard a voice say “I didn’t mean to do that” BUT I’m sure when someone is “Accidentally” shot dead the officer says it was unintentional though it has been proven in many court cases that it was not.
At this point we call the WPD police dispatcher who informs us that the WPD are already there and adds, (paraphrase) “Why don’t you be a nice guy and let them in?”
I just hung up. The reason we didn’t ‘just let the “We need to bug spray” police in’ is because we didn’t want to be beaten or murdered by an officer, and his cohorts who’ve already lied. . .without as much resistance to the unlawful and unethical terrorist actions of the WPD as we could/can muster.
I then go [to] the main door that I have vastly reinforced due to two previous attempted, one by the WFD, home invasions.
A man in police uniform is standing directly on the other side of the door and yells at me “If don’t let us in by the time I count to three (he holds up three fingers) I’m going to kick the door in!”
I ask him if he has a search warrant and he says nothing about that.
He then repeats his terrorist threat of kicking in the door.
We do nothing and finally the four police officers and the terrorist innkeeper Mercer leave. About twenty minutes later, we hear the sound of broken glass moving from outside. I say to my wife, “They’re back!”
We prepare for another illegal, terrorist home invasion attempt but it was
terrorist innkeeper Mercer at the door cleaning up the evidence of broken glass.
He did a poor job.
I then begin making many phone calls to the authorities and various agencies.
This, and many of the previous harassments, are all based upon my religious preferences.

This I added, with pen, at the notaries:
My wife told me, this was when I had gone back to the phone, that one of the officers stepped up to the door smashing cop and said, “What are you doing this for?”
He (the door smashing cop) turned and said “This building’s condemned. They’ve got to come out,” which is another lie.
____________________

When the Terrorist Mercer came back I grabbed the camera, but I forgot to set the antishake, took some pics of him cleaning up the evidence. I have no doubt that the 3 police and, AT LEAST, one criminal in a police uniform were JUST AROUND THE CORNER as the Terrorist Mercer was disposing of the evidence.

Some kind-a groovin' safari - HUH?,
Tor

UPDATE: August 9, 2011
Well
Yesterday I had an appointment, @ 3PM, with
Legal Aid of West Virginia.
I was kept waiting until approximately 3:30 at which time the intake woman and some dude lawyer came outta the main office and give me the bums rush. He had to go in a few minutes.
While getting the BR I said “Oh, I don’t even get to go inside to see if the Jesus calendar is still on the wall?”
At that point the intake female said,
“It’s still there.
It’s MY office and I can have whatever I want.”

Okay, it's her office and she likes a Jesus calendar to look at,
fair enough.
Sooooooooooo why
why why why why why
why why why why
why why why
why why
why
was the calendar on the wall
facing the person being interviewed
and NOT on the wall so it is in intake woman's face?
If I wanted to look at something,
while being monetarily gainfully at work,
I would not have it on the wall
that’s behind my head while I’m at my desk
working and interviewing people.

The intake lady, the little weasel and myself spoke for about ten minutes while standing in the waiting room. After my tale he sez,
“You see, he had the police there to protect you.”
I reply,
“You mean the people who kicked-in the glass of storm door and then
illegally threated to
kick-in our front door were there to PROTECT US!”
The little weasel then said, “Well even if he was there with the police he can come in after 24 hours.”
To which moi retorted, “He ain’t coming in.”
Then the little weasel tried turning on the charm as we
walked-out together and moi played along.

The Terrorist Mercer
(If that’s who he really is)
says he doesn’t want the rent, will not get an eviction notice and has a goon criminal guy in a police uniform attacking our senses.

Also the Jesus children books were gone,
since my last visit, from the
LAofWV waiting room and now there was a book
(“Galug(Spelling?) The Invincible”) which I believe had an image
of Baby Krishna on the cover, along with a
big ole bunch of “elle”s.

NOTE
The WVNCC prof. dude
( Robert A. (Zac) Wycherley )
who whipped the "Jesus" crap on myself
See 'The X FacTOR' blog post
and sent me to an empty office job opening,
well...
that empty office is next door to the
Legal Aid of WV office.

Inquisitors of a feather...
____________________________________

UPDATE: August 14, 2011

Here’s a wee possible connection we just remembered.
It may well tie into the July 3rd, blog posting and
could/should require investigating.

Not long after we, Mrs. H. and moi, started back
as nontraditional students to WVNCC the
(so-called), then, landlords/innkeepers
[T. J. Decker & Paul Edward Ault - Rivertowne Limited, Inc.]
of the Mary Elizabeth Apartments, desperately
wanted us to move to a “Better” apartment
on Wheeling Island.
We went to see it and it was
FAR FROM BETTER!
Though they pushed for us to move, we refused.....
--------------------
Mrs. H. and my, then, major at WVNCC was Culinary Arts.
Marion Gruber, the now
(last time I heard)
director of the culinary arts department, was one of the two professors of the Culinary Arts program and she absolutely hated Mrs. H. and myself.
Prof. Gruber is a raving Hay Zeus follower and despises woman having the right of choice concerning an unwanted fetus, this she stated in class.
I don’t know why she’s this way; perhaps she was forced to have an unwanted child and hates anyone who can choose, perhaps?
--------------------
.....anywho, it was while the Twin Towers in New York
were still spewing vast amounts of smoke,
the building on Wheeling Island caught fire.

The blaze began, according to WTRF/WFD, in the
exact apartment
[Top floor, farthest from stairs, no functional fire-escape]
that we had been “Offered” to move into.
As moi recalls, seventeen families were displaced by the confabulation.
Oh yeah, the name of the burnt building was
The Gruber Apartments.

BTW - IMO:
Prof. Gruber CAN teach you how to run
a profitable culinary enterprise
if if if
if if
if
the eatery’s property is free,
the equipment is free,
the utilities are free,
the food supplies are free
and
the workers are paying you to be there.

Michelle Marie & Marcus Bachmann

2011-07-16T11:39:00.000-07:00

Moi 'twere just sittin' here...
'tweren't doin' nothin'...
then...
moi thunk-up this
(click for a larger view)

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Evil Ape is as Evil Ape does. [with updates]

2011-07-03T05:32:00.000-07:00

Well, They (names shall be named) seem prepared to come @
Mrs. H. and moi with the inbreed cousins that society gives guns,
and permission to kill, to...this time.

If this is moi’s last post due to murder or other such act, here are some people/places that anyone, a.k.a. no one,
[Well at least 2 or 3]
interested in the case can investigate and/or
(This is for the evil apes, only)
REWARD....with much tax free church monies, no doubt.

UPDATE: July 19 I just learned of some other criminal actions by
Officer Mercer @ this official doc.
http://docs.justia.com/cases/federal/district-courts/west-virginia/wvndce/5:2009cv00127/25034/12/
Why am I not surprised?

Stanley Klos: Rich, divorced, religious fanatic, republican and former owner of the Mary Elizabeth Apartments, Wheeling.

Rivertowne Limited Inc.: West Virginia – Owner of MEA and one of the shadiest companies, ever. I wonder which person and/or church REALLY owns it? I do know that The Church Of Latter Day Saints had a missionary outpost @ MEA for years and years, perhaps...still.
In 2007 the State Of West Virginia took over Mary Elizabeth Apartments for taxes.
The now governor of WV is vehemently opposed to a woman’s right to choose.

Paul Edward Ault 65181 3 Hills Drive, Bellaire, Oh
(Just across the street from that county’s sheriff's home)
Rivertowne Limited Inc. employee – supposedly committed suicide on June 17, 2009. Now when Mr. Ault opened up his carpet store it got press with pics in the Wheeling newspaper BUT his, so-called, suicide didn’t get a mention.
It’s my theory that he’s alive and has been moved
by his leaders to another locale.

The West Virginia Snakes Club [Really]: Here is a picture from last week showin’ The City Of Wheeling employees/equipment generously helping out the, private club, Snakes Club get ready for the 4th. TCOW helps the private club, TWVSC, out summer & autumn & winter & spring for years and years and years. What was it Obi Wan Kanobi said about the space-port?
(Click to enlarge pic)

They do that in daylight in the middle of town, imagine
what goes on behind the doors.

Robert W. Hazlett House - 921 Main St: I’ve viewed many, Many, MANY times the inter-exchange of persons and furniture betwixt this, The Snakes Club and MEA
sooooooooooo...they ARE in cahoots.

Mary Elizabeth Apartments (MEA): Slum, oft times owned by some mighty, rich folks. There’s gold in them thar struck with poverty
types and many other “Bussinesses”
orrrrrr
could
it
just
be
'cause
me
be ?

Rick W. Mercer 209 Incline Ave., Wheeling, WV: Perhaps a cop
(Rhonda Wade [See next name] said she knew a Rick Mercer that is a cop BUT I only had a paper with "R. Mercer" on it sooooooo I couldn't say)
perhaps the new MEA owner, perhaps whom he says he is (He refuses to show any ID and stated (with a smirk), to Mrs. H. and myself, that he actually, physically lives in his P.O. Box. He also said he was an Iraqi war vet. Geeeeee, I wonder if he were trained in terrorist tactics by the same U. S. of A. center that trained Osama Bin Ladin? Well, if that person is who they say,
one thing’s for sure,
I know of a filler for a VA hospital's rubber-room.
I surmise that RM has severely
ingrained “Daddy Abandonment” issues.

Do you suppose it’s possible that MEA was sold,
for a song, to a mentally ill veteran
(Lee Harvey Oswald was a vet, wasn’t he?)
with instructions to harass those who ARE Pro-Choice?

Rhonda Wade: The WV Legal Aid lawyer du jour I went to see. She made it quite clear that she’s a religious fanatic and that she would NEVER visit one of moi's web sites.
BTW the
Jesus In Full Glory calendar,
in the sign-in office of WV Legal Aid in Wheeling, is/was soooooooooo colorful.

I also contacted the WV ACLU:
ACLU = American Christian Loonies Upholder

The Ohio County Assessors Office: I never viewed a person that got such a bewildered look on their face,
then a Mona Lisaesque smile,
as they looked-up information for a (MEA) property.

Well, we’ve been threatened, twice this month, by the
(Perhaps Rick W. Mercer? – he won’t show any ID)
Mercer with
“I'll throw-out anyone I want!
I'll throw you out in 24 hours!”
and now he says he will attack with, probably inbreed cousins, the sheriff department. Oh yeah, this person shows-up, no ID, and wants us to give him our Social Security Numbers, financial information, all on a generic form and send it to a P.O. Box.
Even Ms. Wade said she wouldn’t do that.

OOOOOOOOOH them Tor boy!
The difference being...
...Rosco P. would not have murdered anyone.

This is far from in-depth but moi ‘tis in-deep
[But then, who the fudge ain't.
We're all gonna end up in a worm's belly]
and may not get to add more about this meaningless crap.

Anywho we’ll see how the continuing harassments
by religious fanatic loonies goes,
this time.

I guess ten-thousand Atheist blogs shall deal with the theoretical while we battle against the actual with the factual
*cluck cluck cluck*
BTW *cluck cluck cluck*
is the smartest thing to do and I highly recommend it.

Here’s my factual mini-documentary to remember moi by.

BTW: Anyone that doesn’t like the truth of me doc, well. . .if the loonies hadn’t of attacked so many times I wouldn’t have been inspired, to such a great extent, to find the truth; not that the truth matters to the insanely wretched beasts of pain and shame.
YeeeeHaaaaa! Grandpa a corn-holin’ Them while readin’ scripture, that, or a vile situation most similar, is where most of the beasts came from.

BTW: If you want to give your children the greatest gift of all
NEVER REPRODUCE!
I wish me mom hadn’t of, after the first two.
Oh yeah, if you want to celebrate what
The 4th of July
is REALLY about...
Above the Mason/Dixon Line it was about white landowning men wanting some political power and below the MDL it was about fear that the growing abolitionist movement in Great Britain would outlaw slavery and rich dudes liked their evil power and poor whites liked people forced into slavery so they weren’t on
the bottom rung of society.
Sooooo, its about rich guys havin’ power and keeping certain people down.

Hail the Fadiators and Vestal Hookertoots!

Pour another shot of Freedom.

_____ UPDATE: July 6 _____

No attack yet, more lies from the weaselly guy(s).
Feces! Moi ‘tis all geared-up for the defensive counterattack
(As they well know – minions stationed upstairs do do their paid reportin’).

Dr. D. W. Cummings: The Pastor of the Bethlehem Apostolic Temple in Wheeling, WV may just need a look @.
I’m sure, he’s on TV a lot,
I’ve viewed him a number of times @ MEA and we all know religion is about administering, administering bank accounts and I’m sure he could be recruited to have his flock do much of Their dirty deeds WITH a fictional, perforated, hippie Hebrew,
on a stick,
in outer space to say it’s just FINE!
Anywho, while we perched on the porch, July 4th evening, we had a visit from, methinks, the Christian Goon Squad, a most friendly, extremely personable young African American, with buddy that ducked back, walks to porch, blah blahs and then says’ "...god makes everything good."
To which moi replied, “NOT to me!”
He then makes his way to the corner, says “god bless you,” and most quickly ducks around the side before I can say [either] “Darwin bless you,” or “There is no god,” I ‘ve been known to say one or the other.
Now you see, if you reply that Zeus DOES,
but there is no god(s)/devil(s),
make it all groovy
then KILLING YOU would
be A-OK by your own admission,
to those ill minds.
I ain’t, methinks, run into those goons since Pork Land WhoreyGoon, the dude there was white, big spider tattoo on arm.
Rats come in many different shades and most human ones are
sooooooooo friendly.

Sally Habig(SP?) (This was many years ago) of The Wheeling Housing Authority:
Ms. Habig stated to moi,
“I caught a lady here (WHA) embezzling money but that was okay because she was giving it to her church.”

Mrs. H.(ershman) nor moi can remember the name BUT we DO have the paperwork, on one of the WHA/HUD inspectors from waaaaaaaay back when we received HUD
and a whole lot MORE!
This guy comes over, inspects the place, Mrs. H. and I are sitting on the couch, he’s about ready to go and says to moi
“If I’d of brought more money I’d take you over to the Snake Club for a beer.”
To which moi retorted,
“The ONLY way you’d get me in the Snake Club is if you held a gun on me."
At that point he pulls out a pistol, points it at Mrs. H. and myself sitting (totally unarmed) on the couch and grunts,
”That’s why I carry this."
Scared the phuckin’ feces outta both of us.
Habig and Mahat, WHA authorities, were told of this and their response was to LOL.
Oh yeah, Ms. MacDonald (May have been McDonald), the first person we had to deal with at WHA, always had the [then] local religious fanatic channel on her office’s radio.

Say, did I ever tell you how moi got to the Ohio Valley in the first place?
Here’s how,
I was sitting in High School and got a message to go the guidance counselor’s office.
“WTF now,” methinks to moi’s self.
Anywho, I get there and she tells me of a Summer Aid job @ [old] Lock & Dan #8 on the Mon. River. I get the job, work hard, get a Lock Operators position at summer’s end, get laid-off after two months (I almost cried), then a few weeks later get an offer of a position @ [long gone] Lock & Dam #13 on the Ohio River and that’s how
moi firstly done did get here.
Yeah, Sheldon McKee, the wonderful Lock Master @ Lock #7,
(That's where moi went from 8)
as I filled-out forms to see about getting another position with the Corps said to me
"Don't put down Locks #12, #13 or #14"
"Why?" wide-eyed young Tor asks.
"I wouldn't have a F-UCK to do with any of them.”
This was the ONLY time I ever heard him use an
Anglo-Saxon (cuss) word, ever!
Later that week, Harry Maple, the Pittsburgh Area Chief shows at Lock #7.
I get called into the office.
He asks me why I didn’t mark 12, 13 or 14.
I am flabbergasted.
I ain’t gonna say that Mr. McKee told moi to not put those down.
I hummmmmmm and ahhhhhhhhhhhh, lookin’ at Mr. McKee for some help and he did by saying,
“He [me] said he’d go anyplace.”
That was a check-box on the form.
To which moi quickly, and loudly, chimed-in
“Yeah! I said I’d go anyplace.”
OH YEAH, did I go.....anyplace.

Oh, this is amusing, after my first day on the
U. S. Army Corps of Engineers Lock #13 the crew were sitting around the break table and the Lock Master, Donald Wamsley (SP?), looks-up at moi and say’s, verbatim, at a Federal job...
“I guess we’ve got ourselves a Jew Boy, now.”
(Hershman - German - Deer Man/Game Warden (methinks ?)
Jewish folk were forced to BUY, at several points in hisTORy,
non-Jewish names, e.g.,
Rosenberg cost less than Goldberg, etc.
this was a way for
German and French rulers to get some quick cash)

My older brother had told me to expect this
after leaving the gut-wrenchingly vile town of Bobtown, PA;
I suppse it t'weren't soooo bad, but that's how moi felt about it.
Oh, BTW in 2009 Bobtown outlawed Treat or Tricking.
I WISH I’d have been as vastly cool as Charlie Chaplin was when the Third Reich, Nazi, ambassador had said, in a less bigoted manner, the same thing to him BUT I was 19 and simply replied,
“I’m not Jewish. We’re Methodists.” [Even though I had stopped going to church at 12 and had been a Buddhist since 14. When one is accosted one may oft times revert back to basics and moi ‘tis just a po’, old, small country-town boy]

Methinks this may turn into a very looooong blog post.

Oh yeah, 100% for sure,
Mt. Hood Chemical Corporation, 4444 N. W. Yeon, Portland, OR.
What Obi Wan Kanobi said about the spaceport, to the power of nineteen?

Continuing the update.....
there has been a young male and female, The Goslings
(our entitling),
living at the Robert W. Hazlett House for about 2.5 years. A couple of nights ago I caught, just after they pulled-in, the dude trying to tempt our kitty over to him by dangling his keys and callin’ “Kitty, kitty.”
This is the second time I’ve caught the dude.
The next day I went to get a photo of their car.
It had PA. plates.
Soooooooo, I dropped a dime to the WVSP and WVDOT.
The car has vanished from the parking area and The Goose’s Goosemobile has also been absent MUCH more than is usually the case.
I, many years ago, caught a young lady, a RWHH resident, attempting to lure our kitties off the porch. The only person, ever, at the RWHH that was not completely loopy was, as Mrs. H. and moi dubbed him, Father Goose; he drove a sporty, little, silver Mercedes and was, as moi heard, in charge of this area’s AEP’s advertising. He was, as best as I could tell, preet-near close to sane. We ain’t viewed him in years. RWHH is basically a historically registered, even got a plaque, freak house and moi doesn't mean that in a good way.

Since only the DOT and state police were told about the illegally parked car of the Attempted Cat Stealers and said vehicle is now gone,
[UPDATE July 7th - it has returned]
you don’t suppose the good ole’ boys network is in play,
do you?
Do you suppose it's EVER outta play?
That would be a most specious thought.

We have had kitties, definitely, murdered.
Doggy, sweet as could be – murdered and left in the middle of the park.
Orca, super sweet, murdered.
Others have vanished, vanished to be tortured in some vile, corrupt, lunatic Christian ceremony?
I don’t know BUT I would not discount it, the filthy, moronic, pusillanimous piles of thickened protoplasmic saltwater that those people were
...are...& will be.

If I were 100% sure that there were
a heaven I would NOT be an Atheist,
I’d be a Satanist because
I don’t want to spend time
with those beastly Christians NOW
and
most certainly
would not in a [fictional] eternity.

I just stepped-out to water the
Great Wall Of The Mary Elizabeth
plant pots, they were gettin’ quite dry.
Oh,
you can view one,
when the purplelasia were much smaller,
in me “Meadow Moon” video.
Anywho,
the RWHH parking lot is empty, this is not average, the The Snake Club lot is empty, this is most uncommon for this time of day. It has been so for years, I suppose a bartender, a black car (with Jesus fish) parks next to their deck about 90% of the time. When it’s not that car it’s big, silver Mercedes about 8%. Today, as moi ‘twere H2Oin’ the plants, a small red, methinks a Chevy, car just pulled in there.
UPDATE: July 9
Both the Hay Zues black and big, silver Mercedes have been gone for days.

Well, I’ve out-gassed me gas supply for today. I hope nothing evil reactivates it. I plan to tell you of old, and some rather recent, unlawful activities by the WFD, don’t worry (perhaps Old) Assistant Chief, just the story about the attack from the basement right after my quintuple bypass surgeries AND the WPD. The WFD, some members, have been of great assistance sooooo only one tale. Ain’t it a fact that occupations that endow the employee with Instant Hero/Demigod status (Doctor, Lawyer, Firefighter, Police, Politicians [a factual BUT rarefied group], etc) have that reputation because THEY DO attract some of humanities finest folk BUT likewise . . .some of the vilest, too.

You know, I may write a book.
A girl, Cathy Tudish, I
made-out with a couple of times
[Nothing heavy]
(Her brother and moi were HS buddies)
wrote a book titled "Tenny's Landing"
if'in moi recalls, what her bro said, correctly.
WTF: Methinks moi 'tis writtin' one, here.
_________________________________
UPDATE: July 8
In the news right now, and if you’re reading this in 2021/2121 moi KNOWS it’ll be the same, a young lady murdered her child and her, ex-cop, dad helped her hide the body.
On ABC NEWS...
HA HA! News!
It’s really, as the Masters say:
‘Having the Network Wranglers keepin’ the
herd from Stampedin’.
...the question was asked:
“How is it the police could make over 50 visits
(To the kidnappers house)
and not find the missing girl?”
That is MOST simply answered.....
the Good Christian Cops
were sent to investigate the
Good Christian Kidnappers.

TA DA !
A
[NOTHER]
Evil
Christian
Conspiracy
-
E Pluribus
.

BTW: Tor hast counterattacked MANY times, but when you deal with such a vast gang they can, have and do, replace the ‘worn’ parts with ease; worn parts bottom, middle and/or top of the
“Mad Monkey Machine.”
Moi’s delivering of, as best as I could,
justice has ranged from amazingly covert, worthy of an excellently written
James Bond script, to just a Popeyesque
“I’z had enough an’ enough is too much.”
As Will Sonnet used to say,
"No brag, just fact."
I wish such things had never been made so, by Them.
BTW: Details of these thingys are awaiting a
,would/could NEVER happen,
publishin’ deal.
________________

UPDATE: July 9

Well, to cut a long, not paid by the word, story short.
About two months after my massive heart attack and quintuple heart bypass surgeries we hear the fire alarm, in the laundry room, go off.
This is about the hundredth time,
and with no previous fires,
we don’t pay attention to it.
THIS TIME THOUGH,
our back door begins to be [Attempted] broken into.
I am still far from recovered.
I yell at the invading terrorists,
“Who are you?!?! Get away from the door!”
No answer, just repeated kicking.
We call 911.
(911 operator in Wheeling = mostly loony religious fanatics
&
I bet in your town, too.
Does that make you happy?
Think, if you can, when was the last time an Atheist phucked you over and when was the last time a good religious fanatic did?)
Heeheehaha-ha!
The 911 operator tells us that the WFD is already there/here.
Now, those are professional
(in this case) home-invaders, however...we have the back door/room vastly barricaded.
The creeps couldn’t get in.
There was a wee smoke bomb placed in the laundry room but NO smoke coming from our place and it’s moi’s conjecture that the, incapable of responding to someone in there residence repeatedly screaming for ID...
(Believe it or not, moi has a big, loud voice
when I need it to be that way),
...WFD employees/check-collectors were attempting to
give moi another heart attack.

Is this what the WFD were thinkin'?
Hi (Shhhhhhh, don't say 'hi' or anything else), there’s no smoke coming from your place and we just wanted to, without saying a word
(before, during OR after),
smash in your door in the middle of the night
and give you a heart attack, praise Hay Zeus.

Mrs. H. took my BP right afterwards and it was 184/155 and that ain’t good.
Now, Mrs. H. and moi have had need to call the WFD and when you get a
REAL firefighter
you get a REAL hero,
when you get a criminal in uniform
you get
a criminal in uniform.

Next – perhaps – tales of the WPD’s criminal actions.
Oh, BTW we write down all times/events on our large calendar(s), we have years and years worth, sooooooo we can chronological
verify the immoral-criminal activity.

Have a nice day, don’t drown in all the liberty, justice & strength through joy.
_________________
UPDATE: July 10
I’m soooo [un]inspired to
[keep]quit updating this post.
Everyone knows DNA is remarkably twisted soooo,
change
“the soul”
to
"restraint"
and play me off, PP&M.....

Oh yes, a wee question for ye,
Q. Who had more Christians murdered in the Roman Coliseum,
ALL the Pagan Roman Emperors combined
OR
the first Christian Roman Emperor?

HINT: It ain’t the pagan dudes, you sadly sick apes.

Play moi off, again, MP.
BTW...it's the DNA

UPDATE: July 11 This Snake Club car is back

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Moon & June &...

2011-06-09T12:01:00.000-07:00

Here's me latest LP/CD cover parody of
Donna Fargo's
"The Happiest Girl In The Whole U.S.A.,"

moi's latest YouTube video

NOTE: These videos were shot with a camera that cost
over four-thousand
(That's 4,000)
pennies.

&
my next to latest vid.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

The X FacTOR

2011-05-01T07:42:00.000-07:00

It ain’t everyday
that one gets to audition for a major television show here in the Ohio Valley but ole Tor recently did.

Soooo here’s how it all came about.
Tor views ads for The X Factor auditions on WTRF.
Tor Es his audition submission and gets a confirmation date.
This truly surprised my ole arse/brain, greatly.
With all the
"Special" attention that
MammyMaterWifeyWu and moi have become
accustomed to expect I never dreamt of
gettin' into the auditions.

NOTE:
WifeyWuMammyMater
shall henceforth be onlinely know as
Mrs. H.

Soooooo,
it was a warm eve with a few rain droplets gently making their way to the sidewalk.
I walked on up to the
Capital Theater Ballroom's
entrance, jaunted upstairs,
waited a bit, in line, and signed in as #64.
Then I went to the back of the room and found a chair in a corner.
I watched the first 32 auditioning folk and then took a bathroom break.
Some of moi’s
"Friends" are there and they,
moi supposes, were makin’ bets, on whether
I’d whiter or go through with the audition,
sooooo
leavin’ then returnin’ may have given Them a wee bit of chagrin or even a chuckle.

Wow!
God and Jesus
REALLY got a workout from most of the singers before moi.
Many of me fellow chanters were pretty fair to great and could earn a livin’ as lounge or backup singers.
Two or three, of the contestants before Tor, could be world class songsters.

Anywho, as everyone was called-up they went to the stage
via the audience.
So I decide to leave when #62 was beckoned onstage and enter the stage from the side rather than walkup, back to the crowd.
This would also give me wee “Friends” the thought that moi
'twere chickening-out, as I waited just outside the main entrance to the ballroom.

Now some info, the auditions were sponsored by
WVNCC
[De facto:
West Virginia Northern Christian Club]
&
OVMC
[De facto:
Ohio Valley Meanie Christians]

Some HisTORy: I have an A.S., A.A., a culinary arts and business certificates from WVNCC with an overall 3.25 GPA.
Mrs. H. earned likewise with a,
cum laude, 3.67 GPA.
Me GPA would’ve been higher but, since I knew it was only workin' for $10,000 a sq. ft. wallpaper, I did a few experiments to answer some questions, e.g.,
Q. Could I pass the first Developmental Psychology
(An accelerated self-study course)
exam with zero studying?
A. Yes (Barely, but yes)
I also opted for a B in Philosophy since we had a
___fill in the blank___ professor.
How ___fill in the blank___ was she?
“There were no riots after Martin Luther King was assassinated,” that's how.
The kiddies may of bought that but this old ape KNOWS better and stated such.
I done did a lot a statin' in that, and some other, classes.

Anywho, one day, I decided to try the alumni resources.
I went to see the advisor in charge of findin’ employment for students and alumni. His advice to moi was that
“You [I] will see Jesus standing over your shoulder one day.”
However he did have a job contact that sent me to an office in The Mull Center, an unoccupied office for a
no where to be seen company.

I’m sure there are many, MANY of you with similar tales.

I suppose the recent tuition increase request, by
WVNCC, must be to cover the cost of sponsoring community events that help
MAKE THE WORLD SAFE...
...FOR SINGERS.

Now, OVMC aheeeeem had moi standing in a un-busy ER
(moi and some teenager with a hurt foot were all that were there) for 1.5 hours whilst havin’ a major heart attack. No one attended to me in that time except a few people with snotty attitudes and great advice, e.g.,
“Don’t breath so fast you may hyperventilate and pass-out,” wonderful information for someone who’s dying.

Then a bit after 90 minutes I managed to utter
“I hope everyone here gets their Tomás de Torquemada Awards.” A couple of minutes later a doctor enters and says
“No one here is trying to torture you.”
The first thing that came to mind was to retort
“You’re right, you’re not trying – you’re succeeding!”
However
NO WORDS would come outta me yap;
I was in
TOO much pain but
I was somewhat surprised that
ANYONE there knew who
Torquemada ‘twere.
Then I, making it to the sink with great effort and pain, vomited.
A snotty nurse came in to give me a
“Bucket” and chastised me for not,
I don’t know,
holding it?

At that point I got lots of attempts to take blood.
The fact that there wasn’t any blood going through my body didn’t seem to bother, interest nor deter the happy poker.
Then, finally, someone hooked-up an EKG.
A bit later the place was like a
REAL, the kind you see on the tube,
ER.
No smart mouths, just people running, getting me ready to be shipped to
Wheeling Hospital where major heart surgeries take place.

Such ER treatment is not unheard of.
The first blog I read, about heart attacks, was by a woman, at a big city hospital, that was given Benadryl for her heart attack after waiting two hours.

NOTE: OVMC and Wheeling Hospital put on a show of
being enemies, lawsuits and such, but I believe it’s all community theater and when that curtain drops the two high-five each other over their fine performances.

I had wonderfully, amazingly competent care at
Wheeling Hospital.
The two days in IC before the operation and two days afterwards I was under constant surveillance.
Every time I woke there was one or more nurses and/or doctors watching me.
The care was truly world class.
Then...
I went to the regular ward and religious loonies started invading.
Only three times as I remember.
Not a TOO awfully huge bunch of crap for someone who registered as
No Religious Preference.
Oh, at OVMC I was asked twice about my Religious Preference which I answered
“None, I’m an Atheist”
but moi ‘twere too beaten-down scared
(Over five hours of massive heart attack can do that to a guy)
to add the latter while at WH, a Jesuit Hospital.
(I answered “None” but left the "I’m an Atheist" out)
That was after my heart cauterization, in IC.

Oh well, let’s see, the first incident happened when an old dude, must-a been about ninety , came in to my room, yammered awhile and began to leave uttering
“May god bless you”
to which moi retorted
"Thank you for your kind thought."
At that point the old dude turned his head and
IF LOOKS COULD KILL
I’d of been stone cold dead right then.
The next one was an old lady.
She yammered and then added
“It's all in Jesus’ hands, isn’t it?”
I said nothing.
She repeated
"It’s all in Jesus’ hands, ISN'T IT?"
Moi was induced to answer
“Absolutely, positively, 100% NO!”
She stared at the wall for a second and said
"Absolutely," then left.
The next day a person, in religious costume, came in and began a ceremony for the dude in the next bed.....
I turn the TV speaker
(individual audio unit only in my bed)
up so I don’t have to hear.
They get louder, the television is increased in volume.
The incantations rise in decibels and so does
The Beverly Hillbillies' audio.
I put it on max and next to my ear, finally they leave but...was that for the other dude or moi?
Choose whichever ye wishith.

BTW, when I first came out of surgery there was some talk, I've been told, of keeping me for a month @ WH
BUT
after not recanting
and
praising the prevailing mythology –
out the freakin’ door moi went and I ‘twere
D E L I G H T E D,
in a
just dragged/crawled outta the grave sort-a-way,
to head home.

Oh yeah, a week after returning home I went to have a checkup per instructions.
The choices of GP are limited.
We went to visit a doctor that will see you, payment up-front.
Now, I know this dude doesn’t like moi
(Not a small club boo phuckin’ hoo)
BUT
I’ve been recently sawed in two, several times, and ain't in a arguin’ mood.
This dude GETS ME on his table, keeps me sittin’ for awhile, finally comes over, hooks-up the BP, I begin to feel quite woozy, I tell him I'm 'seeing purple and yellow spots that are getting bigger', he keeps moi sittin' up,
then my BP crashes, I pass-out, I wake,
WFD ambulance is called per doctors' orders to one of his staff.
(Ain't it amazing how many doctors need an all female harem,
I mean staff ?)
So, now moi ‘tis back at Wheeling Hospital, in the ER.
The ER doctor keeps tellin’ moi that it’s
“...all in the hands of the man on the sixth floor.”
At least methinks it ‘twere 6th or 7th or 8th but
THAT doesn't matter.
After about five ‘plugs’ for the
Sixth Floor Dude he explains that there is no 6th floor, he means Odin/God and says soooooooooo.

And now, back to the audition.....
So, I wait till
#63 is done, enter, walk to the stage, give a brisk leap (About a ft.) up and walk over to the mic. Since some folks did a bit of yammering before they sang I thought I’d start with a joke, that was going to be
“Is this the auditions for Last Geezer Standing?”
I thought that would get me a nice chuckle since I was BY FAR the oldest contestant, but...nothing.
Then I hear someone yell something at moi.
The voice rings-out again.
I bend forward and ask
WHAT!?!?
One of the judges says,
“The microphone is off.”
"Oh," is my ever so clever response.
I have no idea if the previous user or I, inadvertently, switched it off.
So, I turn the mic on and say
“Well in that case, I guess I'll sing one of my Internet hits...
Incy...Wincy...DNA.”
I raise my right hand high, open me mouth and out comes
a “BURRRRP!”
That gets a laugh...then I start singing.....

During me number I did hear some ‘okay’ and a few ‘strange’ sounds from the crowd.
I finish with a big “Thank you, Wheeling!”
I walk over and replace the mic.
I was expecting a smattering of applause,
but there 'twere zero!
It was like at the end of the overture from
"The Producers'" song
(original movie)
Springtime For Hitler
minus the one dude in the film.
Silence.
Not even crickets.
So I take a couple of steps to exit
THEN a dang fine outburst of applause and cheers.

Moi 'twere halted in me tracks.
So I stop, give the audience somewhat of a suspicious glance, turn, face the crowd, smile and do a fine Edwardian bow,
and (most happily) leave.
Methinks I had the loudest
(sounded that way onstage)
reaction of the eve.
People do love a freak show.

That audio doesn't covey Tor's considerably vast,
emotionally and ass-dimensionlly,
stage presence.

I was amazed that I was allowed to audition but after that response I thought I might, may, perhaps, possibly could make the Top Ten for the next level. I didn't but I was proud to do my part to make the
WORLD SAFE FOR SINGERS.

Too bad there were local judges and not an
applause meter
for moi 'tis sure I'd of made the Top Two -
at that point.

If I had moved on moi 'twere going to do
(Not being constrained by the audition's 01:30 time limit)
Queen's
"Bohemian Rhapsody"
a la Tor.

If you're not familiar with the song, here's a version minus, WAAAAY MINUS, the amazingly grand pathos and undeniably bombastic logos moi was plannin' to project.

To have recorded my vocal of BH would’ve been an extremely pale representation of the energetic choreography and grandiose theatrics moi had planned; it is such an intensive performance moi may have died, literarily, on stage. Wouldn’t that have been a gas, just think, a thespianistic death scene and a biological one combined!
I was going to ask for a headset rather than a hand mic, too.
Oh yeah, I 'twere also going to change the lyrics
“His monstrosity” to
'the theocracy' or 'the oligarchy'
perhaps "Devil" to ‘savior’[?]
&
the last “Me” to 'we'.

Anywho, the entire experience was a gas and I'd recommend it for most folks.

Here’s my latest iconoclastically humorous video.

BTW: The person of the "...rich Jew around" event in “POPE GUY The Pontiff Man” ‘tis not moi but I was there and if someone, GUESS WHO, hadn’t shot his big mouth off, well.
Oh fudge, here’s a condensed version of the tale – the person, on death’s door-stoop
(It was not sure that she was
well enough to withstand an operation –
AT THAT TIME)
, was at Wheeling Hospital.
I went to check her in.
As I was leaving the window the nurse asked what my name is.
I told her, took a couple of steps, turned and loudly added
“And Hershman isn’t Jewish!”
Immediately after that a visiting MD from Pittsburgh,
info he gave,
(With a name that MAY belong to a Jewish person),
came running-out of the ER to assure me that ‘He has never known of Wheeling Hospital turning down ANYONE that needed medical assistance’.
I was givin' him the ‘oh yeah, sure’ look all the time for this same person, I wasn’t there that time, went to WH’s ER about three months previously. She was given some pain pills and sent home where she continued to suffer, horribly so. A good deal earlier the young lady had been taken to OVMC where, after running
five separate pregnancy tests
(one test to tell the, non-existent, fetus’ age
and They ran that test TWICE)
[OVMC is heavily into the 3Bs -
Baby Bartering Business
nudge nudge wink wink to WH]
where she received a prescription for acid-reflux medicine...and sent home...
TO SUFFER HORRIBLY
FOR MONTHS AND MONTHS
in lieu of a most commonly preformed surgery.

Oh, she got the operation (PGTPM time) and is now as fine as frogs' hair.

Well, ain’t this the longest and most detailed of moi’s blog postings?
RheTORical question

BTW: If anyone thinks getting’
Special Treatment
is new to old Tor, THINK AGAIN!
One of the most blatant examples was during moi’s junior year at
Mapletown Jr. Sr. High School where moi had NOT a 3.25 GPA.
Move the decimal one space to the left would be about right.
Gad!
I despised, that, school.
Anywho, I decided to do the thoroughly unexpected, I made-up me noggin to have
perfect attendance for me junior year, which I did.
Then in the sping, on
Awards Day, I sat on the gym's bleachers with rest of the student body the
vice-principal entered, walked up on stage,
now this is the very first thing outta his yap,
looks (without searching) directly at moi and spakes thus
"We’ve decided not to give awards
for prefect attendance this year."
TA DA !
The award was a, not that rare back then, silver dollar.
That’s all.
Which proves the point, if’in THEY ain’t a-gonna allow you to have your justly earned compensation, for being proper when it's
ONLY A BUCK,
then THEY sure as farts are not going to GIVE YOU
[? ? ?]
YOUR 3.5 billion you’re owed.
Well owed,
@ ten cents on the $,
according to the last twelve words of the 5th Amendment
from the
Bill of Fictional Rights.

NOTE: Read on, former post, to find out how that SDI $3.5B is.

Well, I hope you enjoy this as much as moi dug keying it.

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

P.S. Oh, someone once asked, after me massive heart attack and several operations, if I were on disability.
No, even though I DO KNOW OF several folk that suffered less coronary trauma and ARE on permanent disability.
Heck, I didn’t even get temporary disability;
I bet-cha after what I was going/went through moi would’ve even, or even oddly, received @ least
Temporary Disability in a
Stalin era gulag, but nay here.
And just think, the Ohio Valley is somewhat less horrible than the west coast dumps and malfeasance, misfeasance and nonfeasance run rampant
here, there and mostly everywhere the
DNA jungle grows.
There may be, maybe, exceptions...
somewhere...
but I doubt it.

P.S.S.
Here’s moi latest visual parody inspired by Ed Wood.

Oh, and for you youngins
(You know, the folks born a quarter of century after moi – the over 30s)
here's a groovin’ video of the original song.

I wonder if the "She" is really 'Life/Birth'?
It is a P. F. Sloan song.
Click here to be baptized into
The Chruch of ED WOOD
Here is an Ed Wood baptism
NOT
@
The Chruch of ED WOOD

Click here to visit
Landover Baptist Church
P.S.S.S.
And for mofos that try to take their minds off the inevitable by being creepolas,
HEEEEEEEEER’S JOHNNY

I could recount tales for hours & hours & hours &.....

OH YES!
For those of you who haven’t heard of
The Marcellus Shale find,
there has been discovered
ENOUGH
natural gas, just below Tor’s lil’ feet and few million other footies, to run every nuclear, coal, oil power plant, convert every car and truck to natural gas and run them all, nonstop, for the next hundred years.
Of course, this gives the
Masters a huge problem, which is
(as always)
how to make sure all the profits from
natural resources are kept outta the pockets of most of the
citizens.
Don’t worry though, they’ve been doin’ a jim-dandy job of that sooooooooooooooooo far.

Yikes!
There I go.....gettin' all uppity, again.

Mae West & Criswell sittin' in a tree.....

2011-01-12T14:18:00.000-08:00

UPDATE: Contest Winner

Firstly I’d like to thank the billions and billions of people that did not enter me wee DVD giveaway contest.
Gad, that would’ve been impossibly difficult to have handled.

Anywho, Mr. M. of Illinois hast won.
BTW – Sorry about the delay, monkey moi forgot.

Moi's latest YouTube vid
starring Mae West
&
The Amazing Criswell

& me latest wee parody CD jacket

Tor Johnson video homage

2010-12-12T17:07:00.000-08:00

Moi created this video homage to
Tor Johnson
using a most amusing,
though hisTORically inaccurate,
song by
Planet Log 3000

...and when you've had too much 0mas music
here's moi's hollerday classic
The Little Bummer Boy

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Moonbeam Diatribe

2010-10-27T05:33:00.000-07:00

Moi’s latest video that grooves to
Belloluna’s "Moonbeam Diatribe"
one of the coolest songs, ever.
The only things I’d change about this song are
‘soul’ to ‘mind’,
‘ashes’ to ‘vapors’
&
‘heart’ to ‘head’.

Who ‘tis moi votin’ for in this theocratic oligarchy’s punch and judy show?
Here you go.

A wee song by Prof. Tom Lehrer

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

UPDATE: 11-02-10

To wrap-up polysci...
here’s what Skippy Goebbels will be sayin’ about
The Theocratic Oligarchy’s
Punch & Judy Show
in
2012, 2014, 2016, 2018, 2020, 2022, 2024,
etcetera, etcetera,
etcetera
.

SEE GOD's BUTT

2010-08-28T06:31:00.000-07:00

Moi's newest YouTube offerin'

Jackasses in The Bible...&...

2010-08-11T17:00:00.000-07:00

Well, fudge the kanard, moi ‘twere flat on my back for the better part of three weeks.
While attempting to sit, for any length of time, I decided to start my
REAL Bible Stories series.

Hey, look who’s in the
TOP TEN
@
INDIE REVIEW

And now, a vid that asks the musical question
“Where do they go?”

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

It's summertime, summertime, sum, sum, summertime

2010-05-27T08:44:00.000-07:00

Firstly, the DVD contest details are two posts down.

Moi'd like to make a DVD recommendation.

WifeyWuMammyMater and moi watched this, public library, DVD yesterday and enjoyed it muchly.
After watchin' the gig I Wikied it. WifeyWuMammyMater, moi and Keith Richards all agree that havin' The Stones follow James Brown 'twere a less than
top-notch idea BUT that's a minor gooflaw; well, it wasn't to Richards but it 'twere to we.

Click
da pics
for a
MUCH
larger view

About twenty years ago, I dug-up a wee, lone plant from over the hill.....we now have more than one-hundred sq. ft., of what we call bluebells, all about The Kanard. This image only relates the true beauty of this vision at a most rudimentary level.
Oh yeah, me 'Chrome Bird' and 'Assemblage' can be viewed, too.

These beautifully scented plants, that we call Purplelasia, moi found about fifteen years ago growing, at the front gate of an abandoned house, near the main post office. I waited till fall, gathered some seeds and we have that which replaces the bluebells, a few weeks unto.

We had one tiny white peony plant 25 yesteryears
(25 years ago when we began The Kanard [a.k.a. The Yard]
we used the expression ‘Green Thumb’ now we know
it’s a ‘Black, Blue and Dirty Thumb’),
now...many.
Way back then, there were some iris leaves but they did not flower. Honeysuckle Hump, the remains of a huge tree stump, is in the fore then background; it aroms, to the olfactory, even more splendorously than it appears to the eye.

This plant is what we call a Fauxcorn. It ‘twas planted by the
non-we part of nature. They grow where they wish and where they wish is, oft times, betwixt bricks.
They can get seven feet tall and have a candelabraesque growth, @ their top, with tiny yellow flowers. Some years, when they decide to appear, after the plant has dried we have painted the stems and tops and they are beautiful, again.

About four years ago, WifeyWuMammyMater Hershman and moi took a long walk that ended in this wee glen beside the riparian way. As we walked though this lovely wee spot moi noticed this plant with four inch long, quite thin, light purple flowers that trumpeted open to about 1.5 inches. One had a seedpod. The pods are two inches and covered with needle sharp spikes. The plant also has a most foul odor. Needless to say we brought the seed pod home, it opened and now we have ‘spikies’ each year. Now spikies, as do fauxcorns, dry and then can be painted to add a MOST interesting nuance to the garden.

Here is porch planter Pumpkie with hard-workin' Lilies Of The Valley, daylilies and other plants behind. Pumpkie has been pumpkinin’ on the porch for many years.
Last winter he had impatiens dreadlocks.

Here’s a pedestal with a
teakettle planter.

Held flower

A much better view of we'in's "Bluebells."

Moi'll update The 2010 Kanard, in this post,
as
time gooooooooes by
if'in, well...you know.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

UPDATE: June 6
If’in ya ever getz some nice veggie leeks and you cut off the bottom/root part, don’t throw them away, plant them for a beautiful perennial. These have yet to open.

Ahhhhhhh, the daylilies begin. Moss & Ivy Wall is behind with teakettle planter and tea tins and grape seed oilcans. The tins and oilcans have artificial flowers. We grew ‘real’ flowers in them but they are soooooo small they’re a pain in the arse, must water everyday, they blow over easily when the plants enlarge.
The cookie tin, with the impressionist paintings, is an old
(post-Augustusmas 90% off) Dutch cookie tin.

Here’s a wee ad moi found to be most amusing.

UPDATE June 19th
Open leek & moon

UPDATE July 1st
Hostas

"Death @ Disney"

2010-05-10T10:36:00.000-07:00

BTW if you're lookin' fur the DVD Contest, info's in the post before this.

Moi's latest vid
"Death @ Disney"

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Out pray them there bastards!

2010-04-10T15:22:00.000-07:00

A new DVD moive contest is here, but firstly.....

Well, in news of the state, where Tor dwells (WV), it looks like the people that wanted the 29 new mine job openings
out prayed those that wanted the miners alive.

Repeat

In Poland, 90 executive positions have opened

Oh yeah, Dr. Oz had this 76 lb. dude, and his mother and sister, on his “SHOW” last eve.
Moi’s diagnosis is: The 76 lb. dude was in love with his highschool coach but due to social morays couldn’t express that deep emotional function. His mother and sister represent/reflect average heterosexual societal operations. Sooooooo, the 76 lb. guy is torturing his mom and sis while at the same time.....dying for true love AND Dr. Oz gives this
gastronomic Norman Bates a national platform.
Big help Oprah hast done did do-ed it again with Dr. Oz
as with
Dr. Fortune Cookie Fill Phil....and again and again and again.

Incy wincy DNA.

I just discovered, yesterday, that moi's heart doctor's OFFICIAL paper to moi (which I confirmed the results of via phone), for the last year, had my HDLs and LDLs SWITCHED!!!
Is that a BIG THINGY for a guy gettin' over a massive heart attack and quintuple bypass surgeries?
Ohhhhhh phuckin’ YEAH IT IS!
Now he wants to phuck them up TWICE a year - @ double the cost/PROFIT, of course.
HEY, you think it’s easy workin’ at a hospital where a
fifty cent yogurt will
cost you $5!
Heck, with the NEW health care reform
moi betz it's $7, NOW.

Say, you don’t suppose
(I only blog about 1.5% of the feces which occurs)
all them thar highly educated professionals
DID NOT make a mistake
and the HDL/LDL switheroo was part of a continuing program of harassment by religious fanatics, do you?
Tomás de Torquemada was a highly paid professional, TOO.

UPDATE: April 12th I just got back from havin' me blood drawn @ OVMC (a.k.a. Wheeling Hospital's lill' bro). Anywho, when moi first arrived I went to the info desk to see what "Religious Preference" moi 'twere listed as. The records showed "None." Well when moi 'twere in the ER I was asked twice about moi's RP and both times I answered "None, I'm an Atheist." Now you see "None," by itself, does NOT count for any Deist would/could be listed as 'none'. Anywhat, as I left I went to the reception desk, the lady there entered
"None - PT [patient] is Atheist"
to which moi replied, "Beautiful, thank you."

Well, let us harkin’ back to those carefree days of childhood, fairytales and dead fathers for a joyful playtime.

The glory of earthlings.....

Here are some of WifeyWuMammyMater's spring flowers

A new DVD contest is here!
Click the pic to view the enlarged image.

The

SUPER STARS

& other employees

CONTEST

may be entered by sendin’ an email with the subject

MOVIE CONTEST

(No message body is needed)
to
CONTEST IS OVER

Winner shall be drawn on March 4th
(if’in da PC doesn’t phuck-up)
2011 the 3rd anniversary of moi’s massive heart attack.

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

Due to technical difficulties beyond moi’s control.....

2010-03-06T15:33:00.000-08:00

WifeyWuMammyMater and moi had some PC trouble for a few days.
Moi hopes that hast been alleviated.
The winner of
The Vast Wasteland Contest
has been Eed and if’in moi doesn’t receive an answer, within a week, moi’ll
pick another winner*.

*Mr. S. in CA. hast won.

Perhaps, in awhile, moi’ll have another contest.

I had been working on
The World’s Greatest Blog Post
for five weeks but, alas.....that info has been lost.

However, this ain’t been lost. . . . .

What the hey, here are some of moi’s
Creative Commons
works that you may DL and make a few copies of for ye walls and whatnots.
Click the pics to get a MUCH larger image.
Oh yeah, moi had the entire pilot and cast for TUSAHE but, as moi stated, PC fall (really ‘pushed’) down go boom.
"Golden Owl +"

"Luna Moth MAWA"

UPDATE March 7th:
Okay, that's enough Es.
It ain't Betty Boop rather it is Betty Boop's granddaughter - Erika Poob.
Don't ask who her grandfather is.
Oh yeah, No - Judd Hersh tweren't moi's choice for Sam's voice, Owen Wilson 'twere.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor
Another moi just remembered.....

The Vast Wasteland DVD Contest is HERE!

2009-12-01T05:20:00.000-08:00

Yes, anyone 18, or over, can enter
Tor Hershman’s
The Vast Wasteland Contest
HOWEVER
the grand prize will only be mailed to an address within the
48 contiguous
United States of America.

Do not lose your marbles, ye that dwell outside this area, you could have it sent to an acquaintance and they could mail it to you. I’d also recommend that you have a Region 1 player.

If you are the Grand (Only) Prize Winner
these are only a few of the huge stars whose work you’ll receive
on DVD
Adam Sandler, John Wayne, Nicolas Cage, Jane Mansfield, Boris Karlof, Lucille Ball, Charles Bronson, Barry Manilow, Frank Sinatra, Dennis Hopper, Johnny Carson, Jack Palance, Zasu Pitts, William Shatner (And perhaps his evil brother – Billy Poopner) Mel Brooks and many, many, many more stars of silver and little screen.

These are all DVDs not DVD-Rs.

Now, click the pic to begin your cinematic
sojourn through the vast wasteland
and into the many
oases of entertainment
that are awaiting your perusal
that you
could
win

To Enter: CONTEST OVER

The winning Email will be drawn completely at random and contacted on March 4th 2010 the 2nd anniversary of moi’s massive heart-attack.

And now,
more roasted pumpkin seeds and super yummy pie came from WifeyWuMammyMater’s
post-Halloween wonderful jack-o-lanterning.

We don’t usually have flowers at December’s beginning but here are some of WifeyWuMammyMater’s cosmoses.

And now, a word NOT from our sponsor.....

.....and this is also NOT a word from our sponsor.

May random chance seem to favor one of ye of good brains in regards to the contest and all of good brains in everything else.

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

The most plausible conspiracy theory

2009-11-04T07:04:00.000-08:00

The most plausible conspiracy theory
should, as well as many other subjects, have its terms defined.

Conspiracy: Any agreement betwixt two or more persons (or by person/persons allowing said agreement to exist through mis/non/malfeasance) to take part in any unlawful or unethical fraud, crime or other wrongful act or any concurrence of action or inaction seeking a result.

Theory: Carefully analyzed facts resulting in an as yet scientifically unproven hypostasis.

Sooooooooooo, if you were a member of an organization that regularly participates in conspiracy, what would be the one concept (aka meme) that you’d most want disseminated? Why of course, it would be that ALL conspiracy theories are le screw la ball. Hence the primary conspiracy is to have the term ‘Conspiracy Theory’ automatically thought of, in the average mind, as completely unsound.

Now a must see movie recommendation – what if Samuel Beckett had written cartoons?

Ka-now, on to a wee parody moi created a couple of years ago. It is based on the
Barry White album “The Ultimate Collection.”

Eternally temporary, what better joke than to have meaninglessness gooooooooo on forever?

The world’s first vast religion had theology perfectly exemplified via their most sacred symbol – The Scarab; it (Theology or fanatical Atheism ) is nothing more than a turd tasting bug, a shit shoving insect, a dung dining beetle, a feces feasting creepy crawler.

Gad, when I thunk-up the title “Chanting The Name Of The Turd” moi didn’t realize just HOW literally correct moi ‘twere.
Okay, here’s a depressing thought that goes vastly, perhaps infinitely, beyond depression.
Let’s say the universe ends with The Big Chill or The Big Crunch. That equilibrium is achieved either by cold or hot, it doesn’t matter. Now the seventeen overlapping dimensions (According to moi’s model – but one, three, or three zillion matters not) when total equality is achieved immediately reform into THIS ALL OVER AGAIN. Heck, we could be a hundred trillion googolplex (to the power of a gazillion) reliving the exact same lives and we could/would NEVER know it. Man, talk about meaninglessness personified. Fudge, I suppose, ‘cause moi don’t – didn’t – won’t know, the equation is NOT
0 = T = 0
but rather
E(equilibrium) = T = E = T = E eeeee-etc.
Of course E would be 0 to the previous ‘bounce’.

A perfectly oscillating universe, as the cosmologists might say.

It is impossible for infinity to exist in the realm of the infinitely finite.

Did we have freewill the first time around? That is doubtful. Do we have freewill now? Phuck no, if this ain’t the first time! Duck Phucker! Phuck, feces, sheeeet, phuck.....good thing it’s all absolutely pointless or this concept would be a real bummer. Gad, it's beyond bummer; it's the perfect joke.

Oh, I know, ten-thousand others have written similarly, possibly exactly, but geeeez lousie, such crap ola!
My original equation of 0=T=0 would be valid for the universe’s existence ‘cause with each brand new SAME old universe all knowledge would be zero; but, the exact equation would be 17Ds = 18thD = 17Ds [D = dimension]. Oh, BTW: the perception of ‘dimensions’ as up, down, etc. requires the out/insight of a duck.....or turnip.....or most physicists.

However, you and moi shall NEVER know, it isn’t knowable but knowin' it ain't knowable 'tis cool enough. I suppose we could’ve shut down the philosophy/theology departments after Socrates. It doth most completely, now to moi, appear that all we can know is that we know nothing (As ole Soc said), except thingys as - which fellow earthling shall be dined upon this eve till our body is the entrée.

I wonder if John Lennon had a sense of that when he wrote in “Woman,” “...so let me tell you again and again and again” and again in “Instant Karma,” “...on on and on and on on and on,” not to mention (till now) “Starting Over”? That mofoin’ Johnny.

Even doin’ a header over/through/into/on a black hole’s event horizon wouldn’t mean crap; singularities are only wee bits of E/0 already.

You know, if you allow the main menu loop from "American Splendor" to just keep running, you'd have a wonderful example of a seamlessly bouncing universe.

Gad, that doesn’t leave this old monkey with much to blog about.
HEY! Wait a sec, I know.....LET’S HAVE A CONTEST!

Yeah, a moive/DVDs givin’ away contest. I’ve gotten many double copies of DVDs over the years and a contest, well, is something to do. Look for the first Tor Hershman DVD giveaway contest coming, if a car, 747, comet or (residual) peanut butter cookie doesn’t hit, next month.

Oh, BTW these are DVDs from real companies, not homemade ones. Heck, moi ain’t got DVD burnin’ capacity, even if’in moi wanted to.

Well, WTF, unlike so many of the famous directors/actors, who can not stand to view their work, moi REALLY enjoys watching me wee flicks over and over again. I suppose that’s because they are being paid to create the brain farts of others. It may well be a maximum wage job BUT it is ONLY a “Job,” whereas if it’s in moi’s thingy, it’s moi’s wing dingy and moi’s farts do arome ever so much.....to moi. However I’m sure the vast piles or molla MORE than makes-up for their lack of pleasure in jobmaking.
Example:

If this were factually titled it should be
“AmaZING WifeyWu” (aka “AmaZING MammyMater”) and the ‘many hooters’ would be only images, as they are in the flick.

BTW: Me wee flick 'twere deleted from the Richard Dawkins official message board.
Wow! If Dawkins and Maher run the world, just think of it.....no "Unapproved" comedy and no flu shots.

Factoid:
After moi’s first video of
“Tor Hershman’s AmaZING Grace”
I found a listing for moi at the Library Of Congress. It seems some folk put together a project categorizing EVERYONE that had EVER recorded “Amazing Grace.” Well, they ain’t the finest researchers in the world, having moi there, sooooooo I sent the LOC an E and within forty-eight hours der page were deleted.
I wouldn’t mind havin’ a LOC listing
BUT NOT FOR doin’ that
slave traders anthem.

Speakin’ of wonderful WifeyWu/MammyMater, here’s her
jack-O-lantern from this year.
It’s a bit old here and the right-side of the mouth has dried and broken.
Of course, even before the pumpkin is carved WifeyWu/MammyMater’s roasted pumpkin seeds are being enjoyed and later on.....super good pumpkin pieszzzzzz.

Oh, there’s this church parkin’ lot that moi walks beside, a lot, and not until recently did the writing on their wall make moi think of Firesign Theatre’s “Towed Away” (To the tune of the refrain from “The First Noel”).

Oh heck, there’s a whole universe of thingys to blog about perhaps (We CAN never know) over and over and over and over and over again. Once would be the same as a quadrillion googolplex + times, though.

Thingys such as this beautiful “Weed” next to a downtown bank’s parking lot.

Remember - check back next month for the really big DVD contest.

And another thing, just WHAT KIND OF PEOPLE would take beautifully intricate works of culinary art then turn them into SHIT! I swear, those kinds of people nowadays.

Oh yeah, I saw a pic of the USS New York and it has the motto “Never Forget.”
Yikes, talk about ‘never forgetting’, them thar Zoroastrians showed Alexander The Great their fire and he put it out and they ain’t forgotten that and it happened
twenty-four centuries ago.
Say, did you see the WW II U.S. GI drivin' to the Pearl Harbor Remembrance Day ceremonies in his Mitsubishi???

Never forget (and you very well may never be able TO forget) next months big movie contest, right here, that shall be dubbed
Tor Hershman’s
Movie give-a-way
The Vast Wasteland Contest

Ya gotta be CrAzY to have a contest like this!
How can we do it?
Volume! Volume!! Volume!!!

Stay on groovin’ (just 'safari' may be impossible to leave) safari,
Tor

A most Happy Woodmas to all of good brains

2009-10-10T06:01:00.000-07:00

Firstly allow moi to, finally, make my comment on the title (Oh, before I should of said ‘Amusingly brilliant title’) of David Benatar’s book “Better Never To Have Been: The Harm Of Coming Into Existence.”
Well, the equation of existence ISSSSSSS
0 = T(totality) = 0
Now Mr. Benatar’s title is saying, most incorrectly so, the equation is
0 = 0 = something
(Better implies ‘something superior’)
The formula of ‘never having been’ isssssss
0 = 0 = 0
In other words...it is, ultimatelty, exactly the same if you do or never did exist.
This blog’s posts boil down (heehee), as well as everything else ever written or spoken, to nothing beyond this.....

Secondly, Indiana Jones has recently been spotted on the tube, around these parts, doin’ promos to save endangered animals by not purchasing items made from their carcasses.
WifeyWu and moi have joined this crusade and have vowed to never purchase this again.

And now, what Ben Stein’s film “Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed” and Maher’s film “Religulous” are (Well, beyond crowd/herd control/branding) ultimately about.

Click pics to enlarge de comedy

Many of the “Sides” like to argue which flick made the most money, had the biggest circulation, sold the most DVDs, etc. – however, if you want to see what Hollywood digs the mostestly…..

Here’s a true Catch 22 situation – let’s suppose your enemies are ridiculously noisy when you are quite quiet BUT they become nearly silent when you raise your decibels; obviously the evil monkeys desire that you become loud BUT what the hey, wachagonnado on the planet of the lunatic apes? Well, live till you cease just like all the other DNA.

Research has revealed that a large majority of preschool children show a quintessential preference to be creative. . .by age seven, this has been beaten out of all but 10% of them/us. It is estimated that only 2% of adults show the creative brain to be dominate.
As I used to say in the ‘60s – “Never trust anyone over 30.....months!”
Now I'd make that '30 seconds'.
I suppose the Masters figure all that thar ‘creating’ would just get in the way of ‘trajectories’ and altering peoples fundamental functions imparts no lasting malfunction(s). Why, all of human history has SHOWN.....well, shown something.
Now, a night at the movies:
Starring
Oprah as herself
David Letterman as himself
Jerry Springer as himself
Left Brain as the Blue Maggot
Right Brain as the Yellow Maggot
Life as the Dead Rat
CULTure as the Fly
CULTural Approval as the Dead Chicken
CULTural Success as the Limousine
Time as the Dead Elephant

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Life isn’t fair, BUT. . . . .

2009-09-06T19:46:00.000-07:00

Life isn’t fair, BUT death IS!
However, it’s (usually) only fair to the ceased to be.

The next time someone says “Life isn’t fair” to you, be sure to reply "But death is."

Now I shall make a movie recommendation.

This is an excellent film. I watched it three times and one of those was ‘with commentary’ and it was like a 2nd cool flick.

Do buy it, if’in ya gotz the loot, or check your local public library (That’s where moi borrowed the film) for a copy.

There is one point in the film that moi must advise any youngins, or oldins, from being suckered in by and that is Mr. Maher’s theory of impending doom if religion isn’t ended.
This, of course, is crapola; doom is guaranteed with or without religion. Several people have no doubt ceased to exist while you’ve been readin’ this, probably a baby human or two starving to death in the mix. Several people have also, statistically speakin’, come into being which means future ceasing to exist – for sure.

In the film, and I posted this at Mr. Maher’s blogspot, he states that his gig is “I don’t know” BUT he emphatically rants, at the film’s ending, that you must stop goin’ to whichever religion you attend orrrrrrrr BOOM!
[That felt just like
a 1964 LBJ ad flashback - YouTube ' LBJ daisy ' to view]
You Fans know that moi advises you to
suck-up to any prevailing mythology AS LONG AS you’re gettin’ something real (e.g., food, shelter, money, etc) out of it. Now don’t get moi incorrectly positioned, I enjoyed his rant a great deal but uncivilized monkeys in Pope costumes, Billy Graham suits, Buddhist robes, Satanist nudity orrrrrrrr Darwin derbies are still only.....uncivilized monkeys; pretend to be that which will get you the most money ‘cause at end you ain’t nothin’ but DNA goo.

Religion didn’t make people insane – insane people made religion.

Correction Added September 10, ‘09

Well, the above statement isssssss a bombastic one and is NOT 100% correct. Many people, especially modern folk, have begun religions purely as an economic venture.
These earthlings may still be loopy BUT the theology/fantasy is only a prop for the economics, in that case. Also, I’m sure some are 100% sincerely devoted to belief that the majority of humans is something more than – the majority of humans.

Also, again, some possible, anciently faded, remembrance of the lake photos ‘may’ have congealed within moi’s mind. I ain’t sure though.

However, here's an ancient memory, a la comedy, from Steven Banks.
The 'Elvis' (The first 02:08) bit is pure genius.

Should anyone say to you ‘Money doesn't buy happiness’ ask them if ‘poverty does’ then tell them to make a list of everything that money DO purchase and all things poverty’ll get ya at The May Company.
Of course.....one of, perhaps “The,” greatest incurable problems with wealth are those that can not enjoy vast bounty without others lack thereof; those are the truly Poverty Stricken beings and cognitive dissonance rules their noggins vastly so.

Speakin’ of religion, here is a video I made to
Mind Garage’s
Mind Garage
“Sale Of A Deathman.”
Mind Garage is from Tor’s neck O de woods.
Oh yeah, The Village Voice, and every other source that I can find, credits Mind Garage with having invented Christian Rock and that’s why such a big, fat, old Atheist as moi doin’ a video of their song ‘tis a hoot.
However, it IS a dang fine number and the only reason it ain’t on every oldies station
(Well, MG does sing “Goddamn” and that was
SUPER DUPER RADCIAL for that time)
is that, IMO, it was farrrrrrrrr ahead of its time.

This vid will flip your lid, psychedelically speakin’.
Okay, if’in this video had hit when the song was released it would’ve been state of the art special effects and moi ain’t got Disney Class software soooooooo bare with it.
I do think/feel that my heartbeat/thunder intro does most effectively set the song’s mood and it’s a fine funkin’ vid.
I’m pretty sure that moi ain’t never ever previously posted about this video which is the only one moi hast done to someone else’s recording.

Free Video Hosting

It’s kind-a cool that moi made the vid a year before moi’s most massive heart attack ‘cause you “...can’t take me now” or ever because there ain’t any place to take moi, or anyone else, to; this Earth is our only home.
Ain’t that an overall, but absolutely temporarily crappy, drag?
Well, it does, I sure do hope for all you Tor Fans and all of good brains, have its moments of groovin’.

Update: September 12 ‘09
Yes, moi doin’ a vid for the creators of Christian Rock is as ironic as Charlton Heston starring in, arguably, the MOST satirically iconoclastic movie ever made by a major, or minor, studio “Planet Of The Apes.”
When Taylor screamed “It’s a mad house, a mad house!” he tweren’t thistlein’ tixie and echoed the words of John Lennon who stated “Our society is run by insane people for insane objectives.” I don’t agree with that 100%. True, moi’s model shows that most humans are vastly afflicted with cognitive dissonance, hence the tiny minority in their midst suffer because of CD, but. . . well, as I parodied a la George Harrison’s “Piggies” – “In their lives there’s something frightening, it’s even too late for a ray enlightening.”

Frankly it is amazing how POTA got by the studio reps and religious authority EXCEPT that They are sooooooooo speciescentric, sooooooooo bigotedly blind that They never saw.....it was all about we.

Anywho, words more true, MOST regrettably so, than the followin' have never, nor can be, written.

Zira:
But what about your theory?
The existence of someone
like Taylor might prove it.

Cornelius:
Do you want to get my head chopped off?

Zira:
Don't be foolish.
If it's true, they'll have to accept it.

Cornelius:
No, they won't.

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

This just in: September 7
Moi 'twere just Eed these pics which I've never viewed before.
Moi and bro, with fro, at Cheat Lake, WV.

Moi and WifeyWU @ the lake too, 1973.

And a vid from when moi 'twere a kid.

Me said to iself, "Moi....."

2009-08-15T08:49:00.000-07:00

Bob Dylan's doin' a hollowday album, no feces, and moi hast done did been inspired to do another parody album cover.

Click da pic to enlarge

orrrrrrrrrrr as another singer sang.....

Pinball Wizard Tor
See if you can top Tor's four million + score
Gooble Gobble Pinball

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

I’ve sunned myself and I can’t get up!

2009-07-12T15:38:00.000-07:00

More on that later, but now.....

.....I challenge
YOU
I challenge you all
for all you own and all you know
to a game of
-> A N K O M A K O <-
This game is most astonishingly deceptively easily played
but it requires a mind of great suppleness and
vast agility.
Oh, beneath the game you’ll notice that, as of this date, moi ‘tis #1.

October 3rd, 2009
I had a video here that explained the joke of "I challenge you
I challenge you all for all you own and all you know" but YouTube done hast pulled it.

Coming Soon: Getting the last chomp in on Chomsky

Heart Disease: The leading cause of death

WE’RE #1
WE’RE #1
WE’RE #1

USA DNA USA DNA USA DNA!!!

Well, as many of you know moi had a massive heart attack and quintuple bypass surgeries during March '08; nothin’ more on that now, just a reminder to get those flax seed capsules.

The main concept that moi shall now attempt to eruditely pontificate upon is – misunderstandings.

Firstly, why hasn’t your comment appeared here?
Well, I approve VERY few comments, favorable or imbecilic.
I mean, “Nice blog,” “Stupid blog,” “Wish you was dead,” “You’re a genius,” “You’re retarded” and most comments will not get approved unless you have an amazingly erotically arousing pic; so far there has been one such profile photo.
A number of times comments of vast verbosity have not been approved.
I’ll approve one if it makes me laugh or ponder a reply.

Here are the last approved two, one in red – one in blue, that caused moi to think and moi’s replies.

I have another blog where I post a lot of quantum physic videos and people respond with “too mystical,” “not real science,” etc. Seems one can't win when going over the herd's head.

That blog comment caused moi to think of my quote “A genius is not only vastly more smarty-panted than the rest of humanity but also beyond what they can, at times, readily understand.” The finest example, that moi knows, of this is Einstein’s Cosmological Constant.

Secondly,

Oddly enough -- or perhaps not -- you and I share unqualified disdain for the exercise in civic hypocrisy and cynical self-subsidy called the "war on drugs." I've found much else in your blog that is diverting, provocative, and just plain interesting.

Please accept my best wishes for your post-bypass well-being.

Interesting mechanism, the human heart. Even more amazing is the brain capable of devising such sophisticated treatment as multiple-bypass surgery.*

This makes at least some of us wonder how, in a universe prone to entropy,** such sophisticated biological machinery could simply organize itself, let alone attain this infinitely*** puzzling quality called self-awareness....

Take it FWIW. We can at least agree that the war on drugs is a pile of something that's passed through the digestive tract of a male bovine.

*Just plumbing
** Entropy is in a fledgling, nay, an egg cracking state. It will be at least 133 trillion (Give or take a few hundred-billion according to moi’s model) years before entropy is the primary state.
*** The infinite can not exist in our universe and nothing from our universe will be if not part of our universe and how random chance did it was one bit (voz, string, quark, electron, atom, molecule, tinker toy) of stuff, then another, then another. Well, really, probably gazillions at any given time and a few ‘stuck’.

The truest words of The Bible are “All is vanity” and no visual experience, that moi knows of, more adroitly points to the meaninglessness of our existence better than this Charles Chaplin “City Lights” (deleted from the movie) scene.

I’ve oft times noted that most of society will avert its eyes if it feels that a homeless person is looking at them BUT will intently watch the pointlessness of the hobo’s life, with either vast interest OR intense hatred showing from their eyes, when in juxtaposition with the vanity of normalcy. I believe this is why Chaplin didn’t include this brilliantly constructed bit in his film, it was just TOO REAL for mass-consumption and Chaplin DID, unlike moi, enjoy the masses.

Do you know the story in your eyes?
No, but hum a few bars and moi’ll fake it.
If moi ‘twere to cover this song moi’d hav-ta alter a few words,
Fortune to Lifetime –
We’re Really Not To Blame to
We’re Really Just A Flame –
Love to Hole –
It's Been Shining Down Upon Me Now I Realize to
It’s Been Feeding On Our Future History’s Lies –
Can to Can’t –
But I’m Fighthened For Your Children to
There’s Been No Fright For The Unborn –
That to For –
May to Will –
I Can Hide Inside Your Sweet Sweet Love Forevermore to
I’ll Cease Being, Just Like Before Birth, Now Nevermore

Did you under, over or misunderstand that?

Speakin’ of Famous Iconoclasts [What?], here’s a post, by frogleshmee, for a JamesRandiFoundation YouTube video concerning dowsing

“I dnt know if this is the same thing but i was watching a waterworks guy find an old pipe that wasnt in his pipework map. he went into his van and got two rods he walked with the rods untill they crossed and found the pipe under his feet. he said ''dnt ask how it works it just does'”.

Now, my reply to that went something like this.....

'Well, Frogleshmee, It could be that you are someone whose honest opnion the Mind Manipulators really want soooooooooo they simply had a water pipe expert “Say” he didn’t know where the pipe was then he did some hocus pocus and voila...a true believer, who “Saw” the magic with their own eyes, is created.'

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd, the JamesRandiFoundation deleted moi’s comment.

Hummmmmmmmmm, makes ya kind-a think that anytime such a foundation is establishised the people hired to be the frontline (e.g., door-persons, receptionists, moderators, etc) are mostly (As many as They can get hired/volunteered - 100% if possible) agents for the Religious Authority (a.k.a. Voodoo Masters) and some people, as James Randi, are amazingly easily lead about by their, properly stroked, egos.

Heck, Yurri Geller is a con-artist, perhaps he’s even conned himself, BUT what does this make Randi and company?

Oh yeah, got an E reply from Chomsky in which he stated that he couldn’t spare one minute eleven seconds to watch a vid soooooooo I asked if that ONLY applied to “...videos not approved be the Jesuits?” As of this posting, Prof. Chomsky ain’t answered that question OR DID HE?!?!?!

Silence is telling, telling; it sure CAN be.

And a special nod to the unselfish, highly intelligent, supremely wise people who’ve chosen to remain Child Free orrrrrrrrrrrrrr
future corpse-less as the facts are and shall be.
Life is an awful game with no losers, no winners, only one big tie in oblivion.
For a baby shower the one gift that will be used in the being’s life is a funeral gift certificate.

I sunned myself and I can’t get up!
That happened, if only most briefly, this day [7-06-09] at WalMart. I was waiting for the bus and used a large bottle of Equate mouthwash as a pillow (Most groovily cool [literally] on a hot metal bench), stretched out, feet elevated on the shoppin’ cart, and no one nowhere under our sun had a more relaxing thermonuclear radiation absorption than moi this day. It brought back memories of an ancient song.

Of course, if’in moi ‘twere to cover this number moi’d hav-ta change the line “...and I’ve got nobody who can comfort me” to
“your real enemy is your insanity.”

As I lay upon the bench someone said “The bus is coming” and my honest reply was “Oh heck.” That’s how amazingly relaxing ‘that’ time was.

Oh yeah, I’d also change the ‘monkey’ line to
“Just an old monkey, that’s all there is to me.”

Remember, keep looking up and eventually, probably, you’ll get a bird turd in the eye BUT never anything more magical than that. However if you REALLY think about a bird turd, it’s pretty dang magical

(For sure if’in you can CHILL enough)

[Like the coolest thing in the universe, baby-o. You see, it’s all JUST dealerless card tricks]

AND unlike many thingys, some humans are waiting to appear from on high or below or about, a bird turd IS real.
Our fellow humans who try so desperately to make meaninglessness have meaning will never find-out, they shall not learn, they will NEVER know the true beauty betwixt the baseness. However we’d all be, some only then, absolutely remarkable when just above absolute zero.

You Fans know moi's "The Da Vinci Code" parody soooooooo moi shall post moi’s latest.

Oh yeah, here’s a life lesson well worth listening to, youngins.
When the film is 99.99% over, and it’s too late to ask for a refund, Eric Idle will sing that “...life’s a piece of shit.”
However, when the play has not yet opened, and there are still tickets to be sold, Mr. Idle will sing “...life’s a gift.”
That’s the way you should do it, if you’re going to do that, too.
Mr. Idle sang such, most recently, on The Late Late Show. Mr. Ferguson recently proclaimed himself to be an "Iconoclast;" that statement must be the most blatantly bizarre utterance ever issued forth with a Scottish, or any other, accent. Oh, Mr. Ferguson, must have simply confused ‘iconoclast’ with another description, such as '___-____' oooorrrrr ‘____ ______ _____’ oooorrrrr '____'.

I do hope that the drink had a high alcoholic content for if’in not such a ritual would be an incredibly effective means for various illnesses to spread, regardless of your outward appearance, for viruses do not think that they are too good to associate with anyone.

Once again kudos to those that have nobly chosen to not reproduce thus savin’ the unborn from the agonizingly anguish filled salute to entropy that life is and to those who have...that’s something to do. The next bit of film sums the summing of sums to the summit of unbiased observation most adroitly betwixt 04:12 and 04:17 and has a most, deceptively, cute clip ending.

Stay on groovin’
(Watch-out for cars, 747s, comets, peanut butter cookies and squirrels)
safari,
Tor

P.S. I would change some words/lines in this song too, before coverin’ it, but you’ll never know which ones.

With liberty, justice and strength through joy for all

2009-06-28T14:14:00.000-07:00

The hype vs. the reality

And since the film deals with soooooo many robots, here’s moi’s "I Robot" parody

And since we’re on a Butt kick, here’s moi’s 'A Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Waste' parody

And since moi should give frontal views a nod, here’s moi’s Roxy Music parody.

And, with all this optical arousal, I’ll once again post moi’s

Someday I may do my blog post of ‘Why the vast majority of your comments, pro or con, do not get approved’ but not today.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

COMEDY TONIGHT

2009-05-14T18:33:00.000-07:00

The original Mp3.com Parody Chart Topper is now a video.

Just comedy.....tonight.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Moi's new video

2009-04-05T06:19:00.000-07:00

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Let the Black Hole draw out

2009-03-22T18:02:00.000-07:00

Well, having grown bored with viewin’ beasties cavorting and then dining upon each other, I haven't watched PBS' “Nature” in quite awhile.

For years the show's intro had no images of humans. Then, for what has been a brief period, a male and female of our species were present in the intro albeit a sequence a la impressionistically, near abstraction, tracking.

Now not only have we humans been erroneously snatched from the mundane, by PBS’ religious fanatic corporate welfare recipients,
[Wish moi could get some of that thar corporate welfare – DANG GOOD benefits]
but ALL primates, if moi viewed it correctly, have been removed.

However moi ‘tis SOOOOOOOOOOOO happy that the Emperor Penguins have once again
(This is what, the eight-hundredth time?)
been given the chance to have their say on the Penguin Broadcasting System. I've heard soooooooooo many new, stimulating and debatable *squawk squeak squawk* pontificating penguins this eve.

In moi's next blog post , if’in a car, 747, comet or peanut butter cookie slays moi not by then, I plan to speak of David Benatar’s brilliant book “Better Never to Have Been: The Harm of Coming into Existence” along with moi’s yammerin’ on ‘The supreme(theoretical) value of wasted time’.

Oh yes, moi hast a new card. When you’re a ‘character’ methinks 'tis a good idea to have ‘a card’. Moi’s new card has Island Green duct tape on the back, clear tape on the front which produces a carte de Tor that is amazingly strong. If anyone tries to be cute and simply tear moi’s card to bits, they’d best have hands more powerful than the mano of Tor.

Geeeee, I can’t wait to view PBS tomorrow to see if, ohhhhhhh maybe, the cheetahs’ll get to have their say. . . . .again – and again – and again – and again – and again, after all, they are sooooooo delightfully controversial.

Epilogue: Near the end of tonight's PBS penguin platform the narrator spake thus , ‘No one really knows where we're heading’ and that, of course – as most bombastic statements are, is misinformation for moi knows where DNA is heading, and here is that knowledge via a Sir Paul parody.....

Stay on groovin'
(Moi hast made moi's first
planetary revolution since me
massive heart-attack and quintuple bypass surgeries)
safari,
Tor

Just the facts, Sir.

2009-02-08T20:47:00.000-08:00

Well, it’s been pretty big news that Olympic Champion
Michael Phelps had a photo snapped while he was tokin’ on a bong.

It just amazes moi that an intelligent and informed young man could use a substance such as marijuana. Heck, for years and years and years responsible CULTural businesses have been informing the public of the ills of such behavior. Why, just a few nights ago WifeyWu and moi ‘twere viewing an ancient episode of “Dragnet” in which the well-mannered young people of the town were driven to be vandals and assailants by the use of “Mary Jane.” Not only did this episode of “Dragnet” show how horrific “Pot” use is, they went out of their way to show how risk-free the use of tobacco products, even two packs a day, are.

Now why wouldn’t Mr. Phelps just light-up a
happy-go-lucky smoke and have a shot of alcohol?
There’s something that won’t mess your mind, huh?

Happy Hey Zeus Time
from the
Strategically Dead Icon

Well, most of us have been told that the use of “Ganja” can lead to MORE powerful drugs sooooooooo I hope if young Mr. Phelps reads this blog that he’ll take the warning given in this video by Loudon Wainwright III.

And now let us all take a moment to reflect, and/or reflex, on the life of the CEO of the world’s largest and most efficient drug cartel, and marijuana user, Queen Victoria.

Ahhhhh yes, Weed.....one of the staple products of the status quo’s stash-cash-cow.

Illegal [Just to keep the price HIGH] – HUMBUG!
Profitable – INDEED!

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

RIP: The Prisoner Rots Into Pieces

2009-01-18T13:06:00.000-08:00

Moi just discovered that Patrick McGoohan has ceased to exist.

He made one of the, if not “THE,” finest television programs, nay – one of the finest works of literature, ever.

When moi channel
(There were only 4, in Southwestern PA., then)
surfed into this program, in the summer of '68 - methinks that 'twere the time, I was TOTALLY BLOWN AWAY by its splendiferously engrossing and thoroughly
non-quotidian purity of brilliance.
I really dug that show.

How many shows have had an intro of 02:57?
Not many, that’s for sure.

You can watch interviews on this most amazing subject at YouTube.

As the intro points out,
#2: “We want information, information, information.”
The Prisoner: “You won’t get it!”

You know, there is more than one denotation for “Get it.”
One means to have in one’s possession and another ‘get it’ corresponds to UNDERSTANDING.

You see, Patrick McGoohan DID give the information to them, it’s right there in “The Prisoner.” However they were, are and shall be unable to comprehend that information.
They are mentally incapable of grasping the information because it is about THEM
or, as moi states, they’ll never know – they’ll never find-out.

The intro's crashing of thunderbolts inspired moi to add such audio to moi’s
“AMEN (hotep IV, that is).”

I’ve observered that there are two TYPES of people, those that call Master McGoohan’s character "The Prisoner" and ones that call him “#6.”
Guess which kind moi ‘tis, ‘twas and ‘twill be?
Well, of course, till moi ceases to exist.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Ring in the same old year

2009-01-06T10:27:00.000-08:00

Well, moi now knows it’s around the New Year ‘cause the ‘Get Outta Debt’, ‘Debt Consolidation’ television ads have reappeared, they vanish about December or November, on the airwaves – at least in these parts.

You know, if moi wanted to HELP keep folks outta debt methinks I’d run those ads before some hollowday (or other idiotic CULTural shame that plays upon semi-mental societal conditioning ) had them spend beyond their memes’ means; doesn’t it seem as if those fellow Earth dwellers, the ‘helpful financial experts’, REALLY wish to exploit debt - not help people avoid it?

Oh well, that’s DNA (For the most part) folks.

There are bits of the universe that are truly, though temporarily (Always changing), civilized but not all of those are ‘human’, heck, not even all are ‘living’.
People that say "You need ‘bad’ to know what ‘good’ is" ARE evil or insipidly shallow;
if there were no West Nile laden crows in the cornfield there’d still be corn and them thar flakes would be just as yummmmmmmy.

And now.....after that, here’s a video from a most appropriately dubbed group.

[If’in moi were to cover this number I’d
hav-ta replace the word ‘Illusions’ with ‘Existence’]

01-30-2009 Oh my, it looks as if you may no longer listen to this hauntingly beautiful song, it just passed away, BUT here are the lyrics.

"These Things Too"
By Tom Rapp

There was a Persian king
Who wanted to know
What he could say on
Every occasion
That always would be so

Illusions, circles and changes
Illusions, always changing
Like the wind and the rain

He summoned three wise men
From his eternal throne
One from each border
Gave them his order
To write words always true

The wise men thought so hard
For a night and day
Found these words to say on
Every occasion
These things too shall pass away

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

An Atheist in King Arthur’s court

2008-12-17T20:31:00.000-08:00

Behold the lilies of the field, how they grow; they photosynthetically labor MUCH and weave sunlight and chemicals most industrially, they sow much oxygen to the air, too.

Yes, moi once again corrects a saying that was totally in error till me little paraphrasing.

Well, there were no Atheists in King Arthur’s court because he and his court are works of fiction. There are a number of people unaware of that.

Anywho, does a society “Need” its myths?
If societies “Needed” their myths then those ancient societies would still be around soooooooo – society does not “Need” myths.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Great Moments In Late Night Comedy

2008-12-01T08:19:00.000-08:00

Well, wouldn’t it be funny if Emperor Bush were to mention Dave Letterman’s “Great Moments In Presidential Speeches” in one of his speeches? He could paraphrase Nixon with something like, ‘Dave Letterman won’t have my speeches to kick around anymore’.

Yeah, that would be something, huh? Geeeeeee, then we’d all see what a fuzzy, warm ruler he was/is. Ohhhhh, what a lovely, grand land on our salty ball of mud planet.

Frankly, Dubya has been one of the, if not “THE,” most successful presidents of these theocratic-oligarchic states, EVER!

The constantly being replaced (Updated by “Deletion” [a.k.a. “Oblivion”]) status quo have raked in the pelf at amazing rates. That, and enjoying other peoples’ poverty (Along with a big ole bunch of dope), helps take their wee thoughts away from the before mentioned “Deletion.”

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

Andy Warhol votes for everybody 15 times

2008-10-19T09:48:00.000-07:00

Firstly, let’s cover the upcoming elections of The Empire with one of the finest satirical pieces - the Innes/Stanshall number “No Matter Who You Vote For (the government always gets in)”

“Noises on the radio
Megaphones on cars
Sermons from the Street of Shame
Know-it-alls in bars
Posters in suburbia
Experts on t.v.
Don't let them disturb-i-ya
They're just the powers that be

Heigh ho!
Don't worry
Nobody can win
No matter who you vote for, the government always gets in!

Heigh ho!

Oh, great, great slumbering nation
Awake! Set yourself free!
Oh, smell the comforting bacon
Taste the bromide tea
An' give a little chirrup as I ladle on the syrup
Promises are cheap
Let me bear your crosses
Make me Boss of Bosses
Then you go back to sleep! (ha ha ha)

Men have dreams of a finer place
Incorruptible Shangri-la
Women too have their Shangri-Las
Shangri-La la la!

See them in the public eye
Oozing oily charm
Hear them all personify
Down on Animal Farm
Dog eat dog, not cock and bull
Isms are the game
Ism this and ism that
Ism it a shame?”

Here is Neil Innes’ audio page where you may DL many of his, regrettably, wonderfully brilliant parodies and such.

http://www.neilinnes.org/audio/audio.htm

I would suggest that you firstly DL the above number followed by “Slaves Of Freedom,” “God Is Love” and “Questionnaire.”

Oh, here’s a wee YouTube bit from Mr. Innes that moi finds to be a most amusingly rendered view of the overall intellectual prowess of our CULTure.
Of course, Mr. Innes is paid money by The Powers That Be soooooooo he must place ‘It’ vastly betwixt the horizontal stratas of verbosity.

Comrade J. P. Morgan is coming to the town.

And now, here are the two key elements of 21st century big business management in the U. S. of A.
1. Capitalism rules during times of profit.
2. Communism rules during times of debt.
Orrrrrrr, as one economist (Moi forgets their name) stated “...profits are privatized and debts are socialized.”

In other words business as usual a la anthropoid.

And [this] now.....moi’s work of Art As Parody
“Everybody’s Andy Warhol For 15 Minutes”

Click da pic for a much larger work to DL

I used moi’s “I Was Andy Warhol For 15 Minutes”

as half the primary image and moi’s Earth rendering
[rendering of Earth(?)], how quaint, to represent ‘Everybody’.
This is one of moi’s Creative Commons works and you may DL it and have it printed if you have some time and money to waste. Of course, do we have ANY time and/or money that is not ultimately wasted?

No, we don’t.

Let’s see, hummmmmmmmm one thing Mr. Warhol and moi had in common – both our fathers were coal miners.

Let’s see, again, hummmmmmmmm one thing Mr. Warhol and moi did not have in common – he t’were a big ole religious dude and moi ‘tis a big ole Atheist.

I had to change “Everybody’s Andy Warhol For 15 Minutes” before I truly created art.
The first version, now deleted, was a pretty picture dappled with art but that t’were all; creation two was a wee bit better but still not purely art.
The final foundation also needed much retouching, here and there.

Say, that reminds moi of moi’s first experience with Art Censorship, which occurred in Western Pennsylvania and took place over two Methodist Vacation Bible Schools, when moi t’were ten and eleven years of age.

Well, when I was 10, at VBS, we were given a clear plastic panel with the image of Hey Zues (Jesus) to paint. Moi did moi’s best and the teacher was quite impressed with my work. She stood me up and spoke, to the entire class, of how wonderful my work was. Heck, the sky t’were blue, the clouds t’were white, the grass t’were green, Hay Zeus t’were Caucasian color, etc, etc.

THEN, the next year.....when I was eleven, the VBS art project were the exact same plastic panels.

Heck, I already had one that was ‘picture perfect’ soooooo I went creatively wild.
THEN.....I was once again stood before the entire class, BUT this time by a different Vacation Bible School teacher than at age ten, and t’were singled out as an example of a maker of horrible, awful, terrible "...trash."

The next spring, when moi t’were twelve, Mammy Mater drove moi to Sunday School, HOWEVER, she had forgotten to set the clock for Eastern Daylight Time hence we arrived an hour late just as the other kids were getting out.
This gave me the chance that I’d been waiting for. After we arrived back home I waited for a goodtime and asked if I could be allowed to - stop going to Sunday School?

After a wee bit of discussion, I ‘twas allowed to cease attending church and that t’were most cool of Mammy Mater, after my last VBS I really bagan to HATE being at Sunday School.

Heck, WifeyWu had to go to church until moi came along. Her mother even took she and her younger brothers and sister on a walk to Henry Clay’s Furnace one day after church. This, in and of itself, wouldn’t of been bad EXCEPT WifeyWu t’were in Sunday-go-to-meetin’ high-heels and the pathway to Mr. Clay’s iron works is a state park and the path ain’t changed for 200 freakin’ years – AND IN HIGH-HEELS! WifeyWu always made sure to have a pair of sneakers in the car’s backseat each Sunday after that and they DID come in handy or footy, as the case t’were.

Here are a couple of vids that seem to be, at this point, most fitting.

& - for those of you in need of a parody fix, here is moi's latest

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

30 days has September

2008-09-30T09:30:00.000-07:00

Since moi’s massive heart-attack and quintuple bypass surgery moi gets an occasional “Hope you’re alright” E sooooooo moi thought I’d tell you fine folks that moi may begin to blog post every season, or so, rather than each month.

We'll see.

Anywho, moi shall now post two wee parodies that I did yesterday.

Here's moi’s “Foggy Mountain Breakdown” parody

and now moi’s parody of
Great White’s “Shot In The Dark” CD art.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

A perfect-plus day in the land of blood drenched enchantment

2008-08-27T10:09:00.000-07:00

Could George Washington tell a lie?

More on that later but for now allow Tor, as he gazes upriver, to take you upon a photo journey to one of the world’s most enchanting areas. A trip that was taken with truly wonderfully ‘universal class’ people.

NOTE: Do click the pic of Tor to view his too groovin’, super hipster shoes that he got at Payless for 40% off + an additional 40% off due to the store's going out of business sale. Them thar mofos must-a been tucked away in the very back of the storeroom for ages 'cause moi hast been lookin' for a pair for years and years and years.

The day of this wondrous sojourn was one of those ‘Perfect Plus’ days; everything that didn’t go according to plan ended-up surpassing said plan.

It’s really nice to have a day like this every now and again for there are so many of the other type.

This shall be a trip to the land of Tor’s ancesTORs, on his mother’s side – the Hutchinsons of the Laurel Highlands, and other settlers from yesteryears.

Here is a small waterfall that enters the flow of the Ohiopyle falls of the previous photo, click it to view the enlarged photo.

Now we get to the ‘blood drenched’ tie-in.

Soon you'll view Jumonsville’s Glen. This area has always seemed to moi as a magical place. It’s the kind of area that bunnies will hop beside you and merrily munch away.

Wonderful WifeyWu Hershman and moi exchanged our wedding vows on a most chilly (On the outside but MOST warm on the insides) February 14, 1972 just on over thar at the outside cathedral.

A most beautiful locale, indeed, but on moi’s first visit there (Circa: 1960) some of the DNA that is the bunny, no doubt at least a few molecules worth, was DNA that formed a copperhead. My mother took off her shoe, held it and beat the wee but dangerous reptile, for it made NO attempt to NOT encounter us, to death with her footwear. That t’were one of the too cool aspects of Mom.

Now, oh-where-oh-where does this idyllically engaging path and bridge take all that follow it?

Why, it leads to the spot that one of the world’s, at that time, most bloody and long lasting military engagements t’were started by the “Father of our country” as he bushwhacked sleeping French soldiers that were sent on a peaceful mission and who had no security sentinels posted.

Now later on, George signed a paper saying he did, without cause, attack the group and then recanted that sooooooooooo there IS a lie in there somewhere.

But on the day of these pics it was all beauty, joyous laughter and charmingly serene outdoor elegancies, shared with the most exquisitely excellent people, for moi and those folk.

So now old Tor
(From Cooper's Rock - a photo taken the next, a wonderful but not Perfect+, day)
is a-gonna wish all of you of good brains as many Perfect-Plus days, and nights (WifeyWu and moi hast had a few of those), as possible and for any of you, of good brains, that have never had such a time(s), moi hopes you have at least one.

And moi wants all you youngins to know that at the Battle of Jumosville Glen the French were George Washington’s enemy and the British his good friends. That changed 100% a few years later. Remember that during this, regardless of the outcome, and all elections that follow which are based totally within our human CULTure.

Just before the middle of the last century many operaTORs of Mitsubishis were trying their best to kill many Americans, at the end of that century many Americans wanted to be, and became, Mitsubishi operaTORs.

Betwixt and between the waste, the vast and tragically comic waste that went, is and shall go on and on and on.

Soooooo let's end this blog posting with a lill' number sung by Pete Seeger with music and lyrics by Tom Paxton.
This is a, most regrettably, great song sung by Mr. Seeger. Sometimes Pete sang words, written by some other guy(s), that have aged like a fine potato gone rotten, i.e., “Turn Turn Turn,” but this one rings with the awful truth.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

How to wean yourself . . . . .

2008-07-12T13:26:00.000-07:00

How to wean yourself from the propagandistic pabulum touted by Skippy Goebbels (a.k.a. Mass Media News).

A good way to begin is to go to any web page that lists the latest “News” items.

Now, read the first word of each line AND ONLY THE FIRST WORD.

At Yahoo this day the words are – North – Tony – Crews – Road – U.S. – Man – Boy –and that will be all you’ll ever need to know that Skippy Goebbels is EVER going to tell you.

EXAMPLE: This week on C BS’ “60 Minutes” the heavily promoed question has been
A. “Is Faith In God and/or Satan A Portent Of Alzheimer’s Disease?”
B. “What Makes David Beckham Special?”
C. “Did The Soviet Union Want The U. S. To Invade Korea?”
and the correct answer is.....B.

If you could NOT read only one word you may begin your brains' rewiring, for a slightly less controlled by others’ mean memes, with a listen, or two or 500, to moi’s wee “XX CS.”

http://www.soundlift.com/band/music.php?song_id=84348

http://www.soundlift.com/band/music.php?song_id=84449

http://www.soundlift.com/band/music.php?song_id=84949

orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

just dig this, moi’s latest CD cover parody.
It came about while wonderful WifeyWu and moi t’were perched on the porch and WifeyWu spoke the line ‘crack of dawn’.

Here is the original CD cover

Here’s moi's latest parody which would get a higher Neilson Rating on CBS than that soccer guy done gets, I bets ya, I bets ya so, yep, moi bets.

BTW: The “Crack” is from the old Coppertone billboard ad that appeared from sea to shinning sea.

And don't forget that BIG comedy "60 Minutes"'s
finish with Handy Looney.

I hav-ta go now soooooooooooooo

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

7 words you can't say . . . . .

2008-06-23T21:05:00.000-07:00

Seven words you can't say to George Carlin.....now

Well, just pick seven words, any seven.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Glory Grog

2008-06-14T21:13:00.000-07:00

Our Fathers' Day that art on ice hallowed it be thy hot wings

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor Hershman

Yesterday, I had cranberry juice at the libraré

2008-06-11T11:52:00.000-07:00

Last week moi t’were informed of a ‘Lunch With Books’ speaker, at our public library, supposedly talkin' about Richard Dawkins’ “The God Delusion” this week.

"The God Delusion" being offically spoken of in WHEELING!?!?!

I googled the speaker's name and surfed into a most interesting couple of pages for The Reverend Kevin Quirk
http://utarempire.googlepages.com/kmqjournals
and as you can see it’s a well written satire.
Heck, let’s face-it, Reverend Kevin QUIRK!
Now that’s a satiric comedian’s name if’in ever there t’were one, right?

Wrong!

That’s just Wheeling.

So, yesterday it turned-out that moi had some free time soooooo I headed on down library way. Gad, since moi’s quintuple by-pass I can book, top speed, to the book place and a good long walk is great heart rehab.
Anywho, Moi ‘twas not at all sure what was gonna happen at the luncheon. I mean, is this some put-on artist?
A gig featuring Atheistic jocularity AIN’T ever been within Wheeling’s Official idiom.

So, as I made moi’s way from the elevator to the downstairs conference room a couple of well-healed, venerably aged females were in front of moi and they were talkin’ about “Father’s” this and that. Methinks then, "This could be real?" As moi enters the lounge of featured larynxes there are approximately fifty people there. I plant moi’s gluteus maximus in one of the chairs lining the far wall, and directly behind the guy with the camcorder, for those were the only seats not taken. Moi opens moi's cranberry juice
(It's mostly grape but that's cool [read them thar ingredient labels]) and as moi sips, the religious service begins.

About a minute into his SERMON moi realizes that this is a typical Wheeling event, Pope and Billy Graham approved – 100%.
Moi ‘tis surprised not by this.
If the show (There's no ism like Showism) had been an equal exchange of carbon dioxide production moi could’ve logically taken the priest’s theories apart item by item but.....I waited till the ‘question and (continued) sermon’ time.

Soooo, Priest Quirk points to moi for the 2nd question. Moi firstly congratulated him on “...the excellent sermon you just delivered”
(He smiled and put his head down no-doubt in a prayer of 'Kill him, God. Kill him, God! Ohhhhh, please kill him, Hey Zeus'!)
and then I went into moi’s usual song and dance.

During moi's yammerin' I stood, made my way in front of the crowd with long tables and the podium/speaker behind moi, gave the camera a great
close-up when I mentioned death, told the crowd that if they wanted to discover the Awful Facts they could find that at moi’s web-sites, invited them to take one of moi’s cards I left on a table, Priest Quirk asked for one and moi happily obliged, then I told Kev about the satire pages someone made about him
[Google your own name often – really]
that he knew nothing about. Then I walked to the door * and some, perhaps an undercover – out of uniform nun, female began yelling some crap about ‘time’. I said something to the effect of ‘Yeah, yeah, I’m going’ and as I left, moi stopped.....raised moi’s left arm, finger pointed skyward (Well, ceiling/floorward, this ‘twas in the basement) and spake thus to the crowd,

“If you want the truth, there it is (aiming moi’s finger towards the cards moi left) [finger again rises] but IT IS AWFUL.” Then I gave a big wave and said “Bye.”

I ran into a city-county dude and had an interesting talk with him as we made our way across the street, him to work and moi WifeyWuWard. He agreed with moi that it truly was a sermon and he asked for, and got, one of moi’s cards.

* I would have to say the most amusing part of the entire event was just before moi headed for the door as I decided to give religion a tip of the hat.
I raised my shirt to show moi’s
quintuple by-pass scar and was going to
point-out that it was a bunch of highly skilled, church members that did the operation.....NOT the
Rational Response Squad, Brights or any other Atheist outfit. However, as moi raised moi’s shirt for the crowd and camera the priest said something as
“All right, that’s enough” to which moi immediately responded
“Oh, what! Only mythological guys can show their scars?”

Stay on groovin’
(If’in moi were receiving any kind of basic medical care and/or cardiac rehab I would’ve had a reason NOT to go...but...moi ain’t - my time was/is, to a point, for rent ORRRRRRR Awful Facts, tada)
safari,
Tor

Now let’s bow our heads and listen to moi’s
“Jesus Christ AntiChrist”

http://www.garageband.com/song?|pe1|S8LTM0LdsaSkaVe3ZGw

Be sure to read the FUNNY reviews of moi's wee number 'cause @
Garage Band it ain't only fans that hear your works, people are required to 'do reviews', at random, to 'get reviews'.

The ruptured rapture

2008-06-04T20:26:00.000-07:00

There’s a new scam preying on the prayers and it’s called
“You’ve Been Left Behind.”

These folks charge forty bucks a year (Yikes!) and will store and send
62 e-mails, that should cost them about $1.46 a year, in case
The (mythological) Rapture occurs.

Anywho, moi ‘twas inspired to create a parody of
The Rapture’s CD “Mirror” and here it is.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Praise His name.....

2008-05-15T20:55:00.000-07:00

.....and His name is Welk.

Moi hast been tellin' WifeyWu for years that Lawrence Welk was a danged ole Hippie (Who could 'sell it to them' royalélly) and methinks that this here must be proof.

Did you notice the wee hackin' (It must-a been harsh) during the intro and how about them thar grass green jackets the band has on not to mention the butterfly on the young lady's dress. There could be more clues.....can you spot any?

Stay on groovin'
(Moi ain't been over the line since '81 but moi didst dig 'it' but not the people I had to endure to get the 'super it' I had grown, errrrrrrrr.....I had become accustomed to)
Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Yes, Virginia, there is a Nitro clause

2008-05-02T15:07:00.000-07:00

If any you po’ misguided folk believe that government and/or corporate collusion is anything new, here’s the tale of Nitro, West Virginia.

"NITRO FIASCO
The U. S. government spent seventy million dollars in building the city of Nitro, a few miles below Charleston in the Kanawha valley. Today [1974] the combined valuation of all the realty and personal property in the city is $401,240.”

[Seventy Million Dollars in 1919 purchasing power would be betwixt ten (700 Million Dollars) and twenty-five times (One Billion 750 Million) depending of which Consumer Items you use to calculate the rate of inflation. If you use yachts, large diamonds, luxury cars, etc., you get approximately 10Xs - if you use postage stamps, housing costs, oranges, medicine, lettuce, education, gasoline, etc., it runs between 15 and 30Xs. The price/profit from a quart of U. S. solider blood and/or enemy solider blood seems to have remained at about the same strata however the price of 20th century civilian blood has fluctuated greatly from the all time lows of WWII to the highs of WWI. The sum of 400,000 in 1974 loot should be around.....ohhhhhh, I don’t know – a million, two million?]

Well, the scheme with the building of Nitro was a ‘Cost + 10%’.

Now, what that means is that the company gets reimbursed for their expenses plus a ten percent profit; sooooooo if’in the company spent one million dollars they'd get one hundred thousands dollars profit, if they'd spent 100 million dollars they'd realize 10 million, if they spent 1 billion they'd recieve 100 million.

Anywho, huge bonfires burnt for weeks consuming trainload after trainload of new wood.
Millions of Wheeling nails, in barrels, were rolled into waterways.
Tons of machines, wiring, tools, even entire trucks were buried in some of the many rills and small valleys that the West Virginia landscape supplies in abundance.
All these things, and many more, were squandered IMO but.....were and are (quite a few folks are still raking in interest from Nitro profits) considered ‘good business’ by the ones profiting by vast waste as U. S. doughboys died.

Not only was a plant built but
“About 1,800 acres of farming land in the Kanawha river area was bought and transformed into a city with about 3,400 buildings, including houses for a population of 20,000, waterworks, sewers, electric light and power, schools, churches, a hospital with 600 beds, hotels, amusement places, Y. M. C. A. and Y. W. C. A. buildings, stores and other structures.”
Let’s not forget the human hours of labor that, on the +10% side, is best exemplified by the tale of a pipe-fitter as the Commonplace Book tells it but I shall condense the story.
It seems that a man t’were hired to be a pipe-fitter and was told on his first day
‘There’s nothing for you to do today so just go out, walk around and familiarize yourself with the grounds. Oh, don’t forget your 36-inch pipe wrench, keep it with you at all times to be ready to go to work’. The man then goes out, after all he’s being paid to stroll, walks about and goes to his residence after signing his wrench in at day’s end.
The next morn he is told, once again, to meander with his pipe wrench.
The third day he has the same experience.
At the end of the third day the man was upset and told his foreman that he was going to quit.
The foreman asked, ‘why’?
The man said ‘I’ve been here three days, haven’t done any work BUT what really bothers me is that some man has been following me everywhere during work for all three days’.
The foreman smiled and said,
‘Listen, you’re really doing a great job and we want you to stay on and don’t worry about the fellow following you, he’s your assistant’.

But don’t think for one nanosecond that the wheels of American Justice we’re not brought into action for they were *wink*. Of course, good ole arson went into action first and destroyed the administration building at Nitro along with most of the records.
“Incendiarism was suspected when official reports showed the building was found practically on fire all over at one time. Fire Department headquarters only about 150 feet away, with men all around, got no alarm until the fire was well under way. Believing the big safe in the burning building contained valuable papers, the fire chief asked for a guard so he could break it open and save the papers. For this the chief was put under arrest.”

There is MUCH more to the story, all in the same vain vein, with many amusingly tragic tales.

This information is from
“The West Virginia Heritage Encyclopedia”
Volume Fourteen
Pages 240-249
Supplemental Series
‘Commonplace Book’

Edited and Published by Jim Comstock
Richwood, West Virginia
1974

If’in ya google
-
jim comstock new york times
-
you’ll find, and moi ‘tis sure Mr. Comstock would approve, an amusing obituary.

This series of books is amazingly interesting, most tales are quite brief and you may, for West Virginia residents only, be able to find the entire series at your local public library, college or, perhaps, high school; however to find any mention of the “Nitro [WV] Fiasco” online moi hast only found moi’s blog as the source.
Wonder why?

BTW: Ask moi about The Strategic Defense Initiative (SDI) and just where the Strategically Dead Icon (a.k.a. Raygoon) got the intellectual property from or just read moi’s entire blog, it’s there.

What better way to sum a post such as this than with moi's wee parody
"Hey! Hey! We're The Humans"? (rheTORical question)

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor Hershman

oooooooo

2008-04-16T03:29:00.000-07:00

Moi's parody based on The Young Punx's latest CD

The skeleton's crown is, in part, a bit of the World Bank building.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

and that's the way it 'tis, t'was and t'will be

2008-04-13T09:49:00.000-07:00

Today on CBS’ “Sunday Morning” the question t’were broadcast – “What quality makes for a great leader”?
[That may not be an exact quote but it IS, de facto, the question]

When moi heard this I responded – “The ability to make the commoners believe that you’re going to lead them someplace, any place, that they have not been at before.”
This is, of course, based on a historical perspective and therefore unknown to the masses unlike the latest listing of celebrity weddings and box scores
[The world leaders stand, in unison, and shout “Hooray, hooray!”
This takes place ONLY behind the curtain.]

This is hardly a new observation but moi’s wording amuses moi. There is an old, very old, saying that goes – “Here comes the brand new same old thing, again” hence moi’s determined position that there have been approximately 500 others just like moi down through the ages.

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

bent

2008-04-07T06:29:00.000-07:00

At amiright.com someone did a parody CD image of the album "Rent" entitled "Lent" which had nuns, priests and a pope on it.
I was inspired to use some historical pics of popes, with others, to make this wee parody.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

The Student Loan Repo-Man

2008-04-03T22:50:00.000-07:00

Why ain’t there a Repo-Man for Student Loans; someone to take back your grades and diploma(s)?

Because they’re basically worthless, just $10,000 a sq. ft. wallpapers.

Stay on groovin’
(Intellectually Numbing Indentured Servitude)
safari,
Tor

Andy Rooney’s DIRTY Words

2008-03-30T17:56:00.000-07:00

Well, since Mr. Rooney talked, I believe last week, about what he would want to happen if’in he has a heart attack and I know what did happen when moi had a, one of many – so far, heart attack I’ll comment on his “60 Minutes” remarks of this eve.

Mr. Rooney spoke of “Dirty Words.”

A few years ago WifeyWu and moi were takin' a college speech class and one project required a physical demonstration. If’in moi remembers correctly I did the scoring of a mushroon as a gourmet garnish. Anywho, just to fill in the time while peeling and carving the fungi (background music/sound) I recited one of moi’s lill poems/experiments, and it went like this.....

“Daisy Duck and Donald Duck
got out of a truck
and started to f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-FLY!”

What is amazing was that ONLY one-half of the class gasped in shock at the word – FLY.

So, Mr. Rooney, where is the “Dirt,” really? Is it in this ‘grunt’ or that ‘snort’? In a certain ‘growl’ or a
high-pitched 'whimper'? No, Mr. Rooney, none of those vibrations hold the key to the “Dirt.” The “Dirt,” the well maintain dirt, on the bejeweled alter of childish shame, fear and CULTure's conditioning, ‘twas, ‘tis and, regrettably, t’will be betwixt the ears of those so incurably afflicted by our CULTure.

Stay on groovin’
(Learnin’ to type with 20% less right-hand)
[Does this mean future, if any, masturbation will take 20% longer?]
{It's somewhat amusing now.....wondering if'in moi shall live long enough to finsh a posting or roll of toilet paper}
safari,
Tor

Massive heart attack, three surgeries and quintuple bypass

2008-03-28T16:40:00.000-07:00

If any of you folks have been in any chat rooms with moi, i.e., Firesign Chat, you know I’ve bitched about my ‘bad gallbladder’.
Well it t’weren’t moi’s gallbladder, it was moi’s (100% on two major veins) blocked heart flow.

I plan an in-depth bloggin’ about this but this is my first attempt to type, only about 80% of my right hand is functioning, and it may take awhile.

However, talk has it that moi ‘tis the only known person that
let-out a big “Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee” as they were taken from IC to the OR.
Heck, the last thingy the kids were a-gonna hear from moi
(And the doctors gave moi a MOST unenthusiastic 50/50 chance) WAS going to be amusing.

Over the past five years the hideously painful ‘gallbladder attacks’ moi has oft times had were, in fact, heart attacks and angina.

Stay on groovin’
(You’ll never know how much people care about you till you’ve been split open from your right ankle to you groin and just above your bellybutton to your neck)
safari,
Tor

Some more friggin' art

2008-02-13T16:04:00.000-08:00

Here’s moi’s “Butterfly”
Amazingly brilliant title, yes, no, I hav-ta spend less time on thinkin’ them up real good like.

Click on pic for detailed image to DL

As with “Golden Owl” you may download to CD or floppy and have your local photo place make a poster or just print a copy for your personal pleasure as a Creative Commons property.

NOTE: I don’t allow most blog comments, why?

Some are too full of praise, some are too full of themselves, some are too full of sheeeeet.
If'in it's quite simply or gives moi a chuckle, then it may be approved.
This ain’t personal, check moi’s MySpace and see how many comments are there.

Anywho, as always, thanks for E-mail/Comments compliments, questions and/or ramblings.

Ohhhh, BTW this is a MaWa genre bit ‘o’ art.

Stay on groovin’
(Moi hopes you dig moi’s wee art)
safari,
Tor

a gift of art

2008-02-07T15:05:00.000-08:00

Here is moi’s “Golden Owl”
[Click on image for a MUCH larger one to DL]
which you may download, burn on a CD or floppy, take
to your local print-shop and have made into a poster.

Of course, you can just print a copy and hang it at your office or home or wherever.

“Golden Owl,” as are many of moi’s works, is under a Creative Commons agreement; that means, you MAY make copies for your personal use, you may NOT sell or change "Golden Owl" and if’in anyone asks
(and if you make and display it – they will ask)
who did the art, you say –
‘Tor Hershman’,
to which you should hear –
‘Who’?

Then tell them to google – tor hershman.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor

Islamic Toy

2008-01-13T19:41:00.000-08:00

Just a wee thought moi had today.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor Hershman

Wring Out The New

2008-01-01T12:55:00.000-08:00

Firstly, moi would like to say how cool it is that you groovin’ Tor Fans made “The Little Bummer Boy” The #1 song on the All Genres Chart at Sound Lift for the last day of ’07 and the 1st day of ’08, at least;
it is MOST cool.

Secondly, I may write “Why most religious people are crappy” but I’ll need to use a vast amount of cyper space if I list personally experienced unethical, immoral misdemeanors and/or felonious felonies amongst Their actions.

What better way to represent the brand, spankin’, new same old year than with moi’s parody of The Scorpions’ “Humanity – Hour 1.”

May all of you of good brains have the most wondrously wonderful Goo Year filled the most groovingly groovy grooves.

Stay on groovin' safari,
Tor Hershman

Why most Atheists are crappy

2007-12-21T04:28:00.000-08:00

Well, ‘cause they’re DNA and most DNA is crappy.

Example: The owner of the Yahoo Group

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/atheistpoetry/

has one of moi’s captioned photos as his/her Yahoo Groups’ ID;
it’s one of moi’s “There is No God in Foxholes” pics.

Now most of moi’s stuff, that pic for sure, is online under a Creative Commons Agreement. That means you can use it
any non-commercial way you dig AS long as moi gets credit. If the guy/gal had put, oooooooooh something like ‘My profile pic is captioned by Tor Hershman’ that would’ve been most cool.

Moi informed the owner of this via an E.

Now, the really crappy part, when moi asked to join the Atheist Poetry Yahoo Group.....moi t’were denied.

Rest assured that the Atheists that attempt to turn Atheism into a Religion, and that's most of them, DO NOT LIKE moi at all.

That’s why I would prefer a decent Theist to a crappy Atheist or a decent Atheist to a crappy Theist. Regrettably decent Ts and As are few and far betwixt unlike decent T&A hence the approaching 7 billion human population mark.

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

Happy Humbug to All

2007-12-10T17:15:00.000-08:00

A great many of The Old Testament’s stories come from earlier tales (e.g., Gilgamesh, etc) and the style is, mostly, a direct rip-off of The Egyptian Book Of The Dead.

To learn more of TOT times, view this YouTube film

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7iQRFP_e90

The New Testament, well.....to learn more than enough of TNT’s creation, view this two part YouTube film.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZzY2bVsZK5s

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sckuqPulRGk

May you all have a delightful ‘Someone’s Been Embezzling Oil And Selling It On The Side’ Eightdays, a wonderful Solstice, the happiest possible Humbug and may your Hollowdays be filled with the most joyous of pleasures.

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

It's THAT time of year, again.....

2007-12-04T10:36:00.000-08:00

Well it’s that time of year again, when all the “Save energy,” “Conserve electric” and “Energy Hog” public service television ads disappear from the tube or are relegated to the 3:30 a.m. to 4:30 a.m. time slot.
Now, moi supposes, They’ll need to run one during “Rudolph The Ned Rosed Brain Beer” or “It’s A Blunderful Strife.”

Now moi exclaims, as moi scrolls left and right,
HAPPY HOLLOWDAYS TO ALL OF GOOD BRIANS.

Stay on groovin’ safari,
Tor

Tor @ skool

2007-11-29T21:13:00.000-08:00

If'in you are in the
World Civilizations Since 1500 class
@ Southern Methodist University this fall some of the
Class Materials for week 6 included
"Slave Narratives" - Project at Library of Congress,
Harriet Beecher Stowe’s "Uncle Tom's Cabin,"
"Slavery In America" produced by WNET,
Giuseppe Mazzini’s "On Nationality".....
oh yeah, and
“The Anacreontic Song” by Tor Hershman at YouTube.

Almost everyone, except mainly scholars, use the title of “To Anacreon In Heaven” but “The Anacreontic Song” is the correct title.

This class could be the coolest, hippest and most educational history class in the (Darest moi type it? Moi Darest.) hisTORy of academia.

Stay on groovin’
(Gad, moi hopes I ain’t as boring as most college film presentations)
safari,
Tor Hershman.

Mono Sides Now

2007-11-01T04:35:00.000-07:00

Moi viewed a CD entitled “The Spirit of Americana– Both Sides Now” and t’were immediately inspired to do this wee parody.

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
Tor

Happy Halloween/New Years

2007-10-31T05:30:00.000-07:00

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
Tor

"Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace"

2007-10-23T10:47:00.000-07:00

Moi's parody of The Foo Fighters' "Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace"

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
Tor

Too much, or not to munch.....?

2007-10-07T19:08:00.000-07:00

Here are three lill' parodies moi made to Esoteric's art for his CD "TO MUCH POSSE."

The ESSO me thunk-up firstly, then the horsey one, lastly the S.O.S. groove.

This is the orginal CD art (You can find the CD at Amazon).

These are JPEG, higher quality PNG can be viewed at moi's Fan Club.

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
Tor

Fee Elections

2007-09-17T05:01:00.000-07:00

Moi hast not noted any decrease in the invest for dinosaur (oil fields) graveyards.

Moi saw on the news last week that dairy prices are going up.
I’ve been to the store, they have.
CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESE!!!!!!!!!
I heard on today’s news that wheat (bread/pasta) prices will go up.
Heck, it looks like just ‘bout everything ‘ceptin’ caviar and champagne is
a-goin' UP!

Next time someone asks you “What’s Up?” you may reply – THE PRICE OF BEANS.

NOTE: As a free person, in a free land of freedom you may freely substitute the item “Beans” with any other “Commodity,” including human flesh, that ye’s free arse doth freely wishith.

Stay on Groovin’ (don’t drown in all the liberty and justice) Safari,
Tor

Strength Through Joy ("SOUNDS" good, don’t it?) Day

2007-09-17T01:12:00.000-07:00

Capitalism vs. Communism

Capitalism = Terrorism

Communism = Impossible

Wha-ya think?!?!? Apples grow on trees!?!?!

One good (And especially a fictitious ‘good one’) apple doesn’t make the whole rotten bunch unspoiled.

Stay on Groovin' (Well, a person did a Justin Timberlake CD cover parody, then moi parodied that, then I 'twas inspired to do the above) Safari,
Tor

Craig Ferguson (a.k.a. Conan Fodder)

2007-09-11T23:06:00.000-07:00

Well, moi had just awakened from a long nap, turned on der tube and caught the very last bit of an Enculturation Yammerer on C-BS’ airwaves. Well, Mr. Ferguson obviously had the goon on to enhance his chances of becoming a citizen of The Empire. But hey! Who the heck can blame him? After all, Mr. Ferguson needs to be a citizen of America to escape the tyranny, oppression and intolerance of......... SCOTLAND!
But mostly..... as we wee wee-wee (unless you’ve had 8 or 9 cups of rooibos) folk know, it’s mostly, not moistly, to escape..... THE DRAGONS!
It has nothing to do with money or oil money or ores, of any manner nor form.
It is about escaping oppression, tyranny, intolerance and DRAGONS!

If Mr. Ferguson t’were readin’ this I have no doubt that after moi’s “... SCOTLAND!” bit he’d look-up and speak thus “Oh, you’ve been there then?”

Well, anywho..... moi t’were a-gonna do a blogin’ about ‘why the flags were at half-mast on the 11th?’
Why?
Because THEY were too tired from counting all the money They’ve made from the War On Terror to pull them up all the way.
But then moi figured, WTF.

Oh, BTW, moi has an entire new series of parody CD covers, based on the “Monster Ballads” CD, entitled ‘Monster Ball Ads’.
Here’s an example.

To view the rest, join moi’s fan club.
Of course, there are other CD parodies as well, e.g.,
[Front and back covers of The Police's "Every Breath You Take" parody]

Stay on (Most @ the Moe Mint) Groovin' Safari,
Tor

Catholic Banned Books

2007-08-13T03:31:00.000-07:00

Banning books for Catholics!
Hummmmmmmmm, ain’t that like banning the eating of squid for mountain goats?
Yep, and every other big ole group, too.

Hence do view moi’s lill’ YouTube film.
If you hurry you can be the 14,000th person and/or PC to watch it.
I mean.....a whole bunch of folks could watch it on a single puter.

Stay on Groovin' (I just wanted to get an August bloggin' done) Safari,
Tor Hershman

YouTube deleted it.....

2007-07-12T11:50:00.000-07:00

Well, moi’s lill’ “Tor Hershman’s Amazing Grace” video t’were deleted by YouTube ‘cause it didn’t have any vicious violence, did have world renown art and was an excellent parody.

A new site, if'in a comet does not hit, shall be hosting the vid, soon.

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
Tor

2007-07-09T05:24:00.000-07:00

WARNING: The following contains ‘Art’ and is not intended for those steeped in provinciality.

Read previous blogging for more info.

Stay on Groovin' Safri,
Tor

Amazing Slave Trader's Grace

2007-07-06T10:06:00.000-07:00

John Newton, who wrote the lyrics of “Amazing Grace,” became quite wealthy by selling human beings in the Slave Trade.
Later on he bought himself a clergy job, which can be JUST as profitable but MUCH less strenuous though equally heinous, and wrote the following words

"Amazing Grace"

"Amazing grace, how sweet the sound
That sav’d a wretch like me!
I once was lost, but now am found,
Was blind, but now I see.

’Twas grace that taught my heart to fear,
And grace my fears reliev’d;
How precious did that grace appear,
The hour I first believ’d!

Thro’ many dangers, toils and snares,
I have already come;
’Tis grace has brought me safe thus far,
And grace will lead me home.

The Lord has promis’d good to me,
His word my hope secures;
He will my shield and portion be,
As long as life endures.

Yes, when this flesh and heart shall fail,
And mortal life shall cease;
I shall possess, within the veil,
A life of joy and peace.

The earth shall soon dissolve like snow,
The sun forbear to shine;
But God, who call’d me here below,
Will be forever mine."

[John Newton, Olney Hymns, 1779]

Now moi hast composed this wee parody.

"Tor Hershman's Amazing Grace"

"Amazing Grace how sweet her mounds
she gave a wretch like me
dick once was soft but now is sound
so hard I can not pee

‘twas Grace who pulled my heart so near
right next to her cleavage
so sexy did hot Grace appear
D-cup, I do believe

Though many hooters, sweet and bare
already made me cum
Grace has humped me the best so far
Grace’s grace graced my bone

My load has squirted out of me
goo goes splat on the floor
then Grace makes me again horny
no need for pills, for sure

I hope when flesh and heart shall fail
and all of life shall cease
when mortician lifts up my veil
he views a worn-out piece

Earth, eons hence, dissolves like snow
the sun, red giant shine
but right here, right now, I do know
Grace made my twine feel fine."

Stay on Groovin' (Keep an eye open for the video) Safari,
Tor Hershman

Thanks

2007-07-02T17:19:00.000-07:00

Per the previous blogging, the 'Related' vids [YouTube] are back as they always were and 33 views today.

Stay on Groovin'
(If you could just do something 'bout that dang Constitution, now)
Safari,
Tor

Without “Evil” you would not know.....

2007-07-01T07:52:00.000-07:00

Without “Evil” you would not know what “Evil” is.
Only the truly ‘Evil’, or utterly confused/deranged/simpleminded, would suggest other than that.

and/orrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Fascist Control of Cyber Space

Well, anyone who has not been aware of this (Fascist Control of Cyber Space) ever since original Mp3.com ‘twas purchased, for over 370 million 99¢ Value Meal items worth of loot, to only be destroyed/deleted.....well, if They couldn’t (didn’t want to)
figure-out the Korean War then They ain’t
a-gonna decipher anything beyond their noses OR above crotches.

Anywho, moi uploaded some vids to UnCutVideo [Specifically; “AMEN (hotep IV, that is) on December 12th, 2006] and posted NOWHERE about it/them.

Anywho, in two months time “AMEN (HITS)” had over five thousand views.
Then, all of a sudden.....UnCutVideo added “Numbers” to the upper left of each vids’ image; also the amount of views, for “A(HITS)” dropped from 5,000 + to, exactly, 206.
Now, it’s been well beyond 130 days since ‘The Great UnCutVideo Add Numbers Purge Views’ event and "Amen(HITS)" has not had a single hit, NOT ONE!
Still at 206 (Where have all the 5,000+ views gone? Long time right now).

Going from over 80, unannounced, views EVERYDAY for two months to zero views in over four months. . . . .well, seems like "Something" to moi.

Anywho, “AMEN (hotep IV, that is)” started to get a lot of views, at YouTube, about a week ago. Then, three days ago, new ‘other video’ [“Related”] images appeared on “A(HITS)” YouTube page and it has not had a single view in three days. It’s been online quite awhile and has not had so much as one day go by without at least 5 hits.

I wonder if such (possible) shenanigans take the po’ wretched ‘Truth Squelchers’ lill’ minds off the inevitable.
Hey! They’re just like the “...ancient
spin-doctors” moi speaks of in “AMEN (hotep IV, that is.)”.
Ain't They?
Yep, They t'were, 'tis and t'will be .

How NOT unexpected.

Bees made honey, spiders spun webs.....yesterday, today and tomorrow.

Stay on Groovin’
(As moi wrote in “Dine On A Beagle,” “...just like it was in ancient Athens and Rome")
Safari,
Tor

P.S.
If it wasn’t for “Evil,” moi wouldn’t of had anything to blog about today.
Moi could’ve lived without having blogged.....to(and any other)day .

.

Tor's Christian Rock Video

2007-06-21T20:28:00.000-07:00

Soooooooo, anywho, I put together is lill' video to Mind Garage's "Sale Of A Deathman."

According to The Village Voice, Mind Garage invented "TheoRock" that is now known as Christian Rock.

Free Video Hosting

Mind Garage and Artie Kornfeld (Woodstock '69) are also doing a music festival the ides of this July.

Google 'mind garage' or 'goodstock' for all the details.

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
Tor

There are no Atheists in Graveyards

2007-06-02T12:32:00.000-07:00

Moi saw this pic today and added a wee capationing.

Stay on Groovin' (DNA Jungle) Safari,
Tor Hershman

Martin and Lewis' Revenge

2007-05-08T08:24:00.000-07:00

Sergeant U. R. Ant:
Requites, errrrrrrrrrrr, I mean, recruits.....you are here to defend freedom!
You’ll firstly have your hair cut the way you don’t want, get clothes you don’t want, be awakened when you don’t want, do work you don’t want to do and be kept so hungry you’ll eat what’s put in front of you.

My name is Sergeant Ulysses Rumpédump Ant. I am now your mother, your father, your brother, your sister, your madonna, your padonna, your aunt, your your, your our, your you're, your you're in with the in-crowd, your urine with the in-crowd, your anti, your ante and foremost. . . . .your Ant!

Are there any questions?

Recruit Cute Rear:
Yes, Sergeant, sir, I have a. . . . . .

Sergeant U. R. Ant:
YOU WILL ALWAYS, A-L-W-A-Y-S, ADDRESS ME AS,
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!
DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!?!?!?!?!?

Recruit Cute Rear:
Yes, Sir!

Sergeant U. R. Ant:
WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAT!!!!!!!!!!!

Recruit Cute Rear:
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!
Yes, sir!
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!

Sergeant U. R. Ant:
Now, after you’ve been stripped of all your individuality and have no thought other than doing exactly what you’re told to do, when you’re told to do it, where you are told to do it, with and/or to whom you are told to do it with/to, and repeat the words you are told to repeat as to ‘why,’ will you be able to defend our cherished freedom land land of freedom free form formed free of freedom.

Recruit Cute Rear:
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!
May I ask a question, sir?
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!

Sergeant U. R. Ant:
Yes!

Recruit Cute Rear:
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!
Doesn’t a housefly struggle, with total dedication, even unto its last gasp of life attempting to gain freedom from the inside of a window pane and does not a wee, tiny ant, if you pick it up by one of its legs, battle against your taking of its freedom, even though your 10,000 times larger soooooo isn’t the thing we call ‘freedom’ just an instinct that Earth DNA has, such as a morning glory twisting to grow ‘this way’ other than ‘that way’ and aren’t our wars, as well as our CULTures, no more than dandelions battling milkweed (and versa visa) for domination of the meadow with no more ‘actual’ thought than that?
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!

Sergeant U. R. Ant:
YES!

Recruit Hitchcock Cockhitcher:
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!
May I ask you a question?
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!

Sergeant U. R. Ant:
You just did!

Recruit Hitchcock Cockhitcher:
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!
What?
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!

Sergeant U. R. Ant:
What?

Recruit Hitchcock Cockhitcher:
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!
What?
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!

Sergeant U. R. Ant:
What?

Recruit Hitchcock Cockhitcher:
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!
What?
SIR! SIR SIRE SIRE SIR SERIOUSLY SIRRED SIR SIRE SERRIOUSNESSLY SERRIOUS SIRRED SIR, SIR!

Sergeant U. R. Ant:
What?

{fin}

When you ask, “How do you know?”
What you are REALLY asking issssssssssss
“How can I know?”

Quite frankly, you didn’t know, don’t know and you NEVER will know.
Causality exists as a function of this dimension that we call the universe, the same as space, and will not exist when the seventeen overlapping dimensions, that makeup us “Disassocte.”
However, as moi hast stated before, according to moi’s model, this will not happen for 733 billion years (Give or take a few hundred million).
But till then. . . . . here is our human history in (99.99%) toto.

0=T=0
orrrrrr, in a simplified manner
0=(E=MC2)=0
orrrrrr
in terms of Human DNA, as a Monkees' theme pardoy, by lill' ole moi

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LubuSAgB5s

Did you know that 99.99% of the time when I use a precentage it’ll be 99.99%?

Huh, did ya, did ya, did ya, huh, did ya?

Stay on
[or not - there is no reason to live and no reason to die]
Safari,
Tor

Einstein vs. The 3 Stooges

2007-05-02T03:26:00.000-07:00

Well, yesterday moi t’were at the public library checkin’ out some DVDs.

I got an Einstein doc and a 3 Stooges disk, amongst others.

Anywho, after a gazillion liver flushes my liver/gallbladder doesn’t hurt for brief periods.
The day before this day, at the library, they were quite quiescent, soooooo, I could do some comedy as moi checked-out.

I have this lill’ bit, since most folks know I ain’t part of the mainstream voodoo, where I say
“It is like the great masters of wisdom teach us, 'you can not clean away a hole', and those great masters are.....Moe, Larry and Curly.” Now, the people hearing this are sure I’m gonna say something serious. Well, I did. I am sincere (Though I know it will not be taken that way), it is wise what the Stooges teach when they try to clean away a spot of, usually, light then fail at doing so.

Anywho, when the librarian got to the Einstein disk, with the Stooges underneath, I said
“I got the Einstein disk for entertainment and the 3 Stooges’ one for wisdom.”
This made her smile, as I figured it would.
However, at that point, I was just jokin’ around.
Then I stated how wise the Stooges were for teaching that you can’t clean away a hole (Spot of light. I like to say hole) no matter how hard you try.
Then moi said, to my surprise,
“You know, Einstein worked very hard at trying to clean away a hole, a black hole, with his Cosmological Constant and, of course, failed. He should have listened to the wisdom of the Stooges and he wouldn’t have wasted all that time trying to do the impossible. Heck, he may have come up with a Unified Field Theory if he hadn’t of spent so much time attempting to remove a hole of no light.”

Stay on Groovin’
(If you say the CC ain’t crap, then, I’ll bet you’re gettin’ forty, or so, bucks an hour to shuffle equations. You can always add another number, when getting paid by the job or the hour, when searchin’ for eternity; you can always look over another ridge, when getting paid by the job or the hour, when searchin’ for Noah’s Ark. You can NEVER get to the former and there NEVER was the latter. However, both have VERY good ‘job security’ because neither can be accomplished. They are, something to do, though what ain’t?)
Safari,
Tor

Serving god, with a truffle sauce

2007-05-01T11:06:00.000-07:00

According to the Milwaukee World’s blog

http://www.milwaukeeworld.com/

“The House has a Chaplain, and Dan P. Coughlin separates
[NOT State from Church]
$163,700 from the state on an annual basis. Not to be outdone, Senate Chaplain Barry C. Black makes $141,648, which is less, but Black also gets a Chief of Staff in the form of Alan Nicholas Keiran, who makes $97,610.....”

Stay on Groovin' DNA Jungle
(Praise Je$u$)
[You know, if They'd given moi a job designing/writin' pretty lill'
hollow-day cards I NEVER would have had time to discover the awful facts, or, if I wasn't so horribly poor I could have stayed drunk and discovered nothing that did not lay at a can's bottom. Oh well! What is, is. What was, was and what NEVER WAS, never was.]
Safari,
Tor Hershman

"Ask HIM Anything"

2007-04-29T03:35:00.000-07:00

Interestingly enough WifeyWu and moi ‘twere yammering this morn and the
Chaplain Of The United States Senate became the topic.

Oh, you didn’t know, or did you, that the U. S. of A.’s Senate has a Chaplain that opens each (Separated State from sanity) session of congress with a prayer?

[The House of Representatives have their own chaplain]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chaplain_of_the_United_States_Senate

Anywho, moi’s first googleing turned-up a guy name Ogilvie. He served as Senate Chaplain and also as senior pastor of the First Presbyterian Church of Hollywood, Ca.
Soooooooooooo, you see, you see, there is NO Church/State/Hollywood connection, is there?

This Ogilvie dude wrote a book, one of well over forty,
[He must-a gotten paid ‘by the word’ not by the information relayed]
with the title “Ask Him Anything ‘God Can Handle Your Toughest Questions’.”

You know.....I KNOW that I, or anyone, sitting around praying wouldn’t have found the answer to “Who’s the chaplain of the U. S. Senate” however google did it in 0.09 seconds.

Stay on Groovin’
(State + Church + Hollywood = A Really Big SHOW)
Safari,
Tor

BTW: Moi ain’t, yet, discovered what the salary for the congressional chaplains was/is however Reverend Dr. moi would really dig the gig and moi's prayers would be very churchy/Hollywoody, verily;
you see, I’d do excerpts from Ed Wood films.

Kites Outside The Hallway

2007-04-23T03:04:00.000-07:00

Click the art for a more detail view

Stay (or not) on Groovin' Safari,

Tor

Critiquing Google

2007-03-23T09:10:00.000-07:00

Well, firstly moi is a huge fan of Google.
It’s been, since 1999, WifeyWu and moi’s homepage.
Moi ‘tis a member of The Church of Google and composed the church’s first hymn
“What A Friend We Have In Google,”which you may listen to at the following site.
http://www.indiereview.net/bands/239/audio.php

Now, you can easily tell that moi digs Google.

Google is not ‘All Knowing’ but it is the closest thingy to ‘All Knowing’, for sure, in the universe.

However, if you go to Google Images, scroll to the page’s bottom, click on “Google Image Labeler” you’ll enter a world of, what I consider to be, wacky bots.

Google, of course, has no control over the "Partners".
Google Image Labeler is SUPPOSED to exist so that the label searches will become more comprehensive.
Well, as best as moi can tell it AIN’T WORKIN’ THAT WAY.

Some examples:

Here is the "Example" photo Google gives with its suggested labels.

"...bird, sky, soaring, or frigate bird."

Now, here are some images that I tried to label and NONE of the suggestions were matched by the other bot/person(?) [PC for sure].

Moi's labels - Waterfall water stream

city bridge river highway

Washington state xxl veterinary medicine

Not a single label matched the 'labeler partner's' pics.

I’ve been doin’ this, off and on, for about six weeks and its ALWAYS, nearly (I've had a few, VERY FEW, matches), the same.
One thingys for sure, I most assuredly DON’T want anyone from the labeler site (That moi hast delt with) to be on my Family Feud team, HOWEVER, I'd dig ‘em bein’ on the other team.

Stay on Groovin’

(Show me ‘disorented thought patterns’)

Safari,

Tor

COOKIES

2007-03-18T10:00:00.000-07:00

Saint Tor’s Leprechaun Cookies

Moi hast invented these amazingly delicious culinary delights to honor the day that
Saint Tor, moi, drove all the driving instrucTORs outta Ireland.
Ever been on an Irish highway?
You see, you see!
But seriously folks, these cookies are to honor Saint Tor having driven all the snakes from New Zealand, all the elephants from Ireland AND all the lions and tigers and bears from Hawaii; well…..I did those thingys 100% as much as Saint Patty drove all the reptilians from any isle, ever, verily!

Another of one of the many thingys moi hast done, 100%, did do.

Enough levity, now let’s leaven some dough.

Ingredients:
½ cup margarine
½ cup butter
¾ cup brown sugar (packed)
1/4 cup sugar
2 eggs
2 teaspoons vanilla
2 1/3 cups flour
½ teaspoon baking powder
½ teaspoon baking soda
5 ounces white chocolate baking chips
1 3.9 ounce box pistachio pudding (instant, with sugar)
½ teaspoon black pepper
½ teaspoon ginger
pinch of ground cloves
1/3 cup finely chopped or grated walnuts
1 tablespoon green food coloring

1. Preheat the over to 325 degrees
2. Place the sugars and margarine/butter in a ‘large’ bowl allow the marg/butt to soften.
This can be facilitated by carefully setting the bowl on top of the preheating oven.
When soft, beat unto a creamy texture is achieved.
3. In a bowl sift together the flour, pudding, pepper and spices.
If you don’t have a ‘sifter’ just use a strainer; put the stuff in and lightly bang it on the bowl’s side or use your hand, somewhat as a tambourine.
Of course the pistachio bits will not go though the strainer so just dump those in.
4. In a separate bowl beat the eggs, vanilla and green food coloring.
5. Pour the eggs into the bowl containing the marg/butt mixture, blend well.
6. Add the walnuts and dry ingredients, as before…mix well.
7. Add the chips, mix.

Allow the batter to sit uncovered for half an hour.

Run a sink, or container in the sink, of warn soapy water; you’ll want to wash your hands after each cookie sheet rolling.

Roll into approximately 1 inch diameter balls, place on un-greased cookie sheet and bake for 10 to 12 minutes.

When they are brown around the bottom edge take the sheet from the oven and allow to sit for five minutes, remove from sheet, cool and eat.

Moi ‘t’will recommend a cup of rooibos to enhance this fantastically delightful experience.

Stay on Groovin’ Safari,
Tor

The Dark Arts

2007-03-13T04:39:00.000-07:00

Here are two works ("Tahiti Noir" & "Noir Skyway II") from moi's, you guessed it,
Noir Collection. You may make yourself a copy or two of these to adorn your walls, orrrrrrr whatever
[Creative Commons Agreement].
Hopefully something groovin'.
The rest of the collection is in moi's Fan Club's photos.
Oh yeah,
cick on 'em for a larger, more detailed, image.

Stay on Groovin' Safari, Tor

Great Moments In Late Night Entertainment

2007-02-22T21:05:00.000-08:00

Great Moments In Late Night Entertainment

Letterman could show something like.....

Ed Ames throwing the tomahawk on The Tonight Show,

then,

Steve Martin dancing with Gilda Radner on SNL

and then,

a shot of his show during a lull.

Stay on Groovin’ Safari,
Tor

Buddha’s Gall Bladder

2007-02-08T02:13:00.000-08:00

Buddha’s Gall Bladder

“What drives a man,
to do all that he can?”
lyrics from “God Fearing Man”
off the “At Your Birthday Party”
by Steppenwolf.

Okay, this is well-studied speculation, but, methinks that Siddhartha Gautama (a.k.a. Buddha) may have been sufferin’ from Gall Bladder problems.

Seriously folks, not eating spicy, fatty foods – not allowing any emotions, bad or good, to cause arousal, and that laying-down on your ‘right side’ is the exact position one should assume after taking your gallbladder flush medicine.
Now, the ‘enlightened one’ [jeeeezzzsh] didn’t know of gallbladder flushes but that position may well help relieve the pain of an attack anywho;
I KNOW that sitting perfectly still, having no emotional response.....DOES!

Anywho, if’in any ‘chunks’ of Siddhartha’s ‘intenal meat’ (a.k.a. guts) are still around, AND if a test could show gall/liver problems of 25 centuries past, it would be interesting (At least to moi) to see if’in Buddy Buddha were inspired by – NOT spinal windows – NOT brain advancements – BUT by nasty, green globs of cholesterol getting stuck ‘inside’.
Of course, them there Buddhist priests/monks ain’t likely to allow there 'Buddha jerky' to done get tested.

Ten-to-one Buddha was not poisoned, his ancient gallbladder probably just burst or collapsed and that’s what did-in the skinny old dude.

Stay on Groovin’
(There ‘twere more need of bladder evacuation, than no reincarnation ‘bout Buddhie)
Safari,
TOR

Bush Countdown

2007-01-22T17:13:00.000-08:00

Bush Countdown Calendar
Yes, now you can have an Official Bush (2 or 6 year) Countdown Calendar.
Be the first one on your block to begin marking-off the days until another Bush is in the Whitehouse.

You know, moi remembers when the Democrats controlled, and solidly so, the House of Representatives, the Senate and the Executive Branch and NOTHING was any different.

Oh, and if’in you youngins think the crap that Bush pulled (Florida votes and all) was outrageous, it was tiny compared to what the Democrats shenaniganed with McGovern in ’68.

I think the lill’ number at this site sums-it-up most factually.

http://www.neilinnes.org/N.htm#nomatter

BTW: There's a link, at page's bottom, where you can listen and/or download the song.

Stay on Groovin’
(Most people ALREADY know that, that's why they don't do the farce/vote thingy)
Safari,
TOR

The Pledge of Allegiance

2007-01-20T19:11:00.000-08:00

The Pledge of Allegiance

Okay, if They’re gonna keep that “...under god” in the
'Prayer Of Allegiance' moi thinks they should add this
"...one nation, under God, above Satan.”

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
TOR

Floozipaloozy vs. Honored Rump

2007-01-16T07:35:00.000-08:00

Jack Benny vs. Fred Allen – I'm sooooooooo glad moi ‘tis existing in the 21st century where thingys are sooooooooo different.

Stay on Groovin’
(Ain’t seen anytïng like that more than.....ooooooooh, a gazillon times, B 4 - & bingo waz its name 0 )
[Look at the pretty birdie]
Safari,
TOR

Today IS __ _ .

2007-01-15T07:45:00.000-08:00

Happy earthday to moi, happy birthday to moi’s self, happy, happy
pinched-out day to meeeee.

Well, fifty-third delineation hast pasted and moi is still, as is ALL life, serving entropy.

Well, Fans, if’in ya’s ain’t heard this one, here goes NOTHING; many, many moon ago…..in the grate [sic] Pacific Northwest moi was workin’ at a factory.
This was the same place where I created the concept and beginning scenes for “Stripes,” the new characters and lines, that have become part of the American Culture, in “Rocky III” and the whole freakin’ flick (Well, 90%, or so, of the flick's 'meat') “Some Kind Of Hero” amongst other wee thingys, such as the “Four Ps” [Marketing nomenclature] of the Burger King “Eat A Pita” campaign and the Strategic Defense Initiative (a.k.a. SDI – a.k.a. ‘Reagan’s Star Wars’) that the Strategically Dead Icon 'took' {See the last eleven words of the 5th Amendment to the Bill of Rights (“Just Compensation,” that NEVERRRRRRRRRRRRRRR HAPPENED, and never will.)} for another example of “…from sleaze to shinning sleaze.”

Anywho, in accordance with moi’s lill’ plan of
‘These evil people seem to enjoy it when I talk about movies and such, sooooooooo if it keeps Them entertained that’ll help keep me my job so I can take care of
WifeyWu and the Three Wonderful Kiddie Critter Kids’---

Yes, moi knows…..it’s a longwinded entitlement for a plan but, hey, moi ‘tis just a po’ ole country boy.

---so I kept 'entertainin' Them as best as moi could/would.

Anywho, one day moi ‘twas ‘entertaining’ the other factory flunkies (These were times of lunch and breaks in the lunchroom) when I said
“You know, I always knew (just kidding, of course) that my birthday would become a National Holiday.”
“What are you talking about,” asked Desi Megasea (SP?)
“Well, I just happened to be born on January fifteen and when Martin Luther King’s birthday is made a national holiday, so will mine.
"President Reagan is AGAINST making King’s birthday a holiday" gleefully chimed Rachael (a.k.a. Maxime) Fredericks (SP?)
Then moi, nonchalantly as one would who really didn’t give a flyin’ phuck, replied,
“Oh, that’s okay. Reagan may be outta office in a while and four years after the next election, FOR SURE, and someone WILL come along THAT WILL make January the 15th a National Hoilday.”

A week, or so, after that Raygoon announces that he now favors making Reverend Dr. King’s birthday a holiday, BUT…..IT MUST CELEBRATED ON JANUARY 20th!

And it was DUTIFULLY (Sieg Hive) so celebrated for years and years.

Hey! I guess this must be SOME DAY.

As Sergeant Friday oft’ times spokeith “Just the [awful] facts.”

The things that can happen when you’re workin’ at Mt. Hood Chemical Company (4444 N. W. Yeon, Portland, Oregon) orrrrrrrrrrrrr Earth in general.

The moral of the story? THEY ain’t a "Moral" majority at all.

Stay on Groovin’
(DNA Jungle)
[That's why TOR is poor and 'They' do ignore TOR]
Safari,
TOR

Origin Of Jesus @ YouTube

2007-01-01T00:47:00.000-08:00

The Origin Of Jesus Christ @ YouTube

View part one at this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZzY2bVsZK5s

and the conclusion at this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sckuqPulRGk

YouTube’s most SHOCKINGINGLY ASTONUNDING video of this or any year, or not.

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
TOR Hershman

Got One God ? ? ?

2006-12-01T05:18:00.000-08:00

Did'ja ever wonder where the "One God" thingy, Jews and the word "Amen" came from?

Well, moi's lill' YouTube video explains those details.

{copy & paste YouTube URL, you all}

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z7iQRFP_e90

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
TOR Hershman

Dylan was RIGHT !!!

2006-11-30T10:47:00.000-08:00

Dylan was/is 100% CORRECT!!!!!!!!!
The answer IS blowin’ in the wind.
I NEVER realized what Dylan was REALLY talkin’ about till I did my parody of The Beatles “In The End.”

CRAP!!! If you wanna hear it.....but really, why bother?
I mean you’re living it.
You’ll die it.
Even if you don’t diet, or if you Diet Of Worms it, or are part of worms' diet, or think you’re Diet Smith, what ever?

Anywho, it’s 00:19 long and the final song, how appropo, here.

http://www.musicclick.com/bands/289/

Stay on Groovin’ Safrai,
TOR

YouTube

2006-11-07T11:41:00.000-08:00

My first lill' music video
"Hey! Hey! We're The Humans"
@ YouTube

(copy & paste URL)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2LubuSAgB5s

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
TOR

One Good Apple.....

2006-11-01T07:48:00.000-08:00

One good apple doesn’t make the whole rotted bunch unspoiled.
Though most religions do "Sell" that concept.

Just another of moi’s The Awful Facts paraphrases.

The original “Saying”
(“One bad apple doesn’t spoil the whole bunch”)
is pretty much what “Rotten Apple" Human DNA functions say about civilized Human DNA functions.

Did you ever stop to think (HAHAHA! Gad, moi ‘tis amusin’) that if’in it ‘twere not for the fictional Satan character The Bible would, barely, be two pages long and would end with ".....and god created Eve for Adam and they lived happily ever after. The End.”

Stay on Groovin’ Safari,
TOR

Oh yeah, and once again, for the Hollow Days, here is moi's parody of a priest, a choirboy &, well, you know the rest sooooooooo
without further ado "The Little Bummer Boy."

[copy & paste URL to LOL]

http://www.soundlift.com/band/music.php?song_id=82930

Da Vinci Code II

2006-10-01T12:05:00.000-07:00

I just did a re-tweakin' on my "The Da Vinci Code" parody.

Stay on Groovin' Safari,
TOR

Don’t T [& A] ouch That Die-isle

2006-09-10T18:03:00.000-07:00

Don’t T [& A] ouch that Die-isle
(Coming soon?????????
The ratings boys wouldn’t mind.)

Firstly, I’ve watched all of ONE “Survivor” show.
That’s 1 (one) program, not series.

Secondly, this season’s promo started with the words,
“What happens when civilization is stripped away?”
[If’in that ain’t an exact quote, it’s dang close]
To such a remark moi immediately responded,
“A civilization would NEVER have/want a show such
as “Survivor.” In a true civilization, unlike this
CULTure, anyone who would even suggest such
an idea would be placed under strictly supervised,
highly compassionate observation in an attempt to
discover what had gone SOOOOOOOOO
vilely wrong with that biological unit.

Thirdly, moi shall now cease to enumerate each
step in this exercise of verbosity.

Now, allow this Amazon River Of Consciousness, moi, to
“Seemingly” divert/digress.

Well, anywho, there has been a television ad, for YellowBook, with
David Carradine (“Kung Fu”), running on moi’s tube of late.
As the commercial begins you view actor Carradine sitting in
Lotus Position as he is approached by a young “Wisdom
seeker” who asks, in a tone filled with wonder,
“How did you become such a great master?”
Now, to this moi immediately said
(I don’t talk ‘at’ referees/umpires/soap-operas.)
“How did David Carradine get to be the “Wise Master”
in that TV ad? Because of Racial Bigotry, that’s how!”

You see, as moi understands the tale, Bruce Lee had been
the numero uno choice to play Kwai Chang Caine, in “Kung Fu,”
however it was deemed unsuitable for a full-bred Chinese
person to play a half-breed* (0.5 Chinese - 0.5 European) BUT
a full-bred European COULD play the part.

I know, I know.....tell Charlie Chan ‘bout it.

But remember, this was the 1970s not the 1930s.

However, as moi has written,
“The times they ain’t a changing.”

Now we return to “Survivor”
(I’m sure a gazillion people have already written the following
line, moi shall not even google to confirm, “The Amazing Racist”).

Will you watch this “Survivor?”
If’in moi does, moi shall be VASTLY SURPRISED!
In other words, NO.

However, next series installment, separating the
human DNA by religion, while keepin’ a mostly
diverse grouping, e.g., African/European/Asian
Catholic group - Native American/European/Latino
Hindu group, etc, etc,
would make for some mighty POPular televison.

[Didn’t the Joovians (Fognal Entertainment)
{See: “South Park”}already do this?
Or was that "The Simpsons?" Jonathan Swift?
Ovid?]

Granted, not as Nielsen (ranting) Rating-ly
wonderful as a 3-way bare-knuckle bout
betwixt this Pope, that Billy Graham and
this Dali Lama, BUT, a (no pun intended)
smash-hit video sensation just the same.

Stay on Groovin’
(Go out and tell it to the forest to see the
impact it’ll FUNDAMENTALLY have
*grunt grunt snort*)
Safari,
TOR

P.S. There’s a poster about town advertising
Fort Henry Days and it has the caption
“Do OR Die.”
This shows how _______-up They are.
It should read
“Do (or don’t) AND Die.”
I mean, EVERYONE at the Battle Of Fort Henry
haaaaaaaaaaaaasssssssssssssssss ceased to exist.

*Bred or Breed: You see there is only ONE race, the
human race.
However there ARE different breeds of human DNA just
as there’s multi-breeds of canids or felids, i.e., Pygmies, French,
Aborigines, New Jerseyites, etc / Irish Wolfhounds, Dingos,
Shih-Tzus, Puppy Puppers, etc / Kitties, Kitty Kitties, Little One Hershman,
Tubby Tebbies.

P.S.S. In a civilization.....laughter, would be a rarefied state of being, contented similes the norm, the average expression.
Now, be sure to google moi’s “The Lion Farts Tonight” to LOL!

This just in. . . . .

2006-09-05T03:37:00.000-07:00

A story moi was informed of, from Ireland Online:

"Paul McCartney and his estranged wife Heather Mills have spent 40 minutes alone together in a desperate attempt to end their bitter divorce battle amicably.

The former Beatle reportedly invited Mills into his US holiday home in East Hampton on Wednesday after she picked up their three-year-old daughter Beatrice.

Shocked security guards were asked to leave the scene while the pair tried to resolve their differences.

A source tells British newspaper the Sunday Mirror: "Paul and Heather have been doing their best to avoid each other for months. But they have decided to put their differences aside for the sake of their daughter."

For the kids, sure, Sir Paul & Heather.
BUT!
You're gonna save yourselves from a TON of crapé.

Stay on Groovin'
(What Paul and Johnny tried with Apple was one of the
greatest and most admirable efforts EVER attempted in all of history)
Safari,
TOR

Survivor - Racism

2006-09-02T16:19:00.000-07:00

[This isn’t moi’s “Survivor - Racism” bloggin’
I’m planning that for the near future, but, I really
couldn't think of a great entitlement for this one
sooooooooooooooooooooo]

(Another lill' parody CD by moi)

Moi ‘twas a-gonna write a massive exposé concerning.....
people hittin’ balls with sticks, network affiliates (Eastern/Central/Pacific timeZ),
societal mind-control, rain and other acts of pure nature,
BUT.....I’ve decided to give [They swiped the others] the CULTure another
of moi’s
[To go along with moi’s “I pity the fool,” “Just say, No” and
“Real men don’t eat quiche,” and who knows how many
other, additions to the Pop CULTure. Well, that lill' SDI thingy but
that was just to see how far moi's vocie was travelin'
orrrrrrrrrrr
how big the ears were that were listenin'.
It worked.
YIKES!!!!!!!!!
It worked!
{POP? Prisoner Of Politics? In some cases, YES!}]
bits of
(purely natural)
[orrrrrrr purrly natural for the kitties]
jeaneyeousity.

This is, of course, part of
“The Frankensteinian States of America Loves a Plagiarist/Liar” series,
a continuation of the
“All Men Are Created Equal, Written By Slave Owners” compilation.

Well, anywho, if’in you’re talkin’ ‘bout someone on the verge of
death, from now on, ye may wax metaphorically with the line
“They’re dancing with Durante.”

This has to do with Carmen Miranda
passin'-out while rehearsing
with Mr. Durante and ceasing to exist later that eve.

“They’re dancing with Durante,” well, crap.....okay, so moi ‘tis
40 years late with that one.
I wouldn’t have gotten anything except malfeasance, a.k.a. a hard
time, for it anytime/way soooooooooooooooooooo
40 years late sounds pretty dang groovin',
all tïngs considered.

Stay on Groovin’
{Used to say little other than
“Pinch” for a couple of decades}
[Let’s see ‘em make a movie, book or government program outta THAT!]
(DNA Jungle)
Safari,
TOR

Wheeling, West Virginia's Meating of the Minds

2006-08-16T07:53:00.000-07:00

Moi's "All You Need Is Love" parody

Well, last eve moi stopped in at the Ohio County Library for
the, weakly, weekly Wheeling Meeting Of The Minds gathering.

Moi 'twas never at a WMOTM meetin' before.

Moi 'twas NOT disappointed.

Firstly, they have a pic of Professor Einstein on their flyer.
Why?
Well, because they’re pretty sure that Albert will NOT be
showin’ up for a meeting.

As soon as moi started to speak one of the older dudes
stands and moves, with great haste, toward the exit.
I wished him “Happy passing of the collection plate” as
he departed.

Now, the old moderator, a tiny Tomás de Torquemada, tries to
alter the conversation from moi’s
‘It matters not if you have
religion or not’
to
‘If religion went away the world would be
a better place’.

This was, of course, a ploy to give religion SOME importance.

At that point I reply
“Chimpanzees don’t have a god/devil and
they engage in political intrigue, love triangles and war.”

Then the tiny Torquemada, quickly joined by his minion a young
large-mouthed religious fanatic vet, begin yammering thus
“Chimpanzees COULD have a God.
Yeah, they could have a God.
You don’t know if they have a God or not.
Chimpanzees might have a God.”

As moi stated, I was NOT disappointed, in.....the.....least!

Wheeling Philosophers: The quintessential definition of an, no “Oxy” really required, oxymoron.

Stay on Groovin’ (DNA Jungle) Safari,
TOR

“Bush says U.S. still at risk of attack”

2006-08-10T10:43:00.000-07:00

“Bush says U.S. still at risk of attack,”
that’s a Yahoo News headline right now.

Well, duh,
risk - no.....definitely WILL happen, YES!

Now, let’s do a lill’ something that politicians seldom, if ever, do.
Let’s DEFINE OUR TERMS.

Firstly:
Bush says = Script written by CULTurally/economically bound entities.
Secondly:
U.S. still at risk = Buildings, oil wells, mansions, themselves (When Bush/ANY Status Quo-ite speaks).
or
U. S. Still at risk = People, when the cameras/microphones are on.
Thirdly:
Attack: Getting whopped/killed real good like.

Okay, now lets see about past killings/wounding of
Citizens of the U. S. of A.

Since 9/10/2001,
The (Past) Taliban controlled Afghanistani Army, the
(Saddam controlled) Iraqi Army and all other Terrorists’ activity
combined has killed thousands of Americans and wounded tens of thousands.

Since 9/10/2001,
Americans have deliberately killed tens of thousands of Americans and wounded
hundreds of thousands of U. S. of A. citizens.

The nature of most, if the environment dictates such to the preprogramed
biological computer (a.k.a. Brain), human DNA is to attack other human DNA.
Some attacks are cerebrally engaged by abstract concepts, e.g., freedom of/from, god/satan, etc.
Some violence is economically/socially prompted by the CULTure and its
norms/expectations, i.e., sex/(love,hate), finance, etc.

The monetary expenditure to prevent/understand the former, the
processes that bring about thousands of deaths, is GIGANTIC!

The investment to prevent/understand the later, the
functions that cause tens of thousands of deaths,
‘tis but a fraction of the former and the lion's share of
those monies go to persons that DO NOT want the situation(s) rectified.

Stay on Groovin’ (DNA Jungle) Safari,
TOR

Pick A Fetus

2006-08-07T08:51:00.000-07:00

Moi's latest version of that
popular and fun game show

Stay on Groovin' (DNA Jungle) Safari,
TOR Hershman

Hava Nagila

2006-07-28T10:00:00.000-07:00

Moi's lastest parody of a CD by the group Hava Nagila

Stay on Groovin' (DNA Jungle) Safari,
TOR

"EU to continue stem-cell research funding"

2006-07-24T11:13:00.000-07:00

“EU to continue stem-cell research funding”is a headline on Yahoo right now.

Well, ddddddduh, of course!

They veto it in the U. S. of A. because They are
rich and will fly-off to Europe and have
private stem-cell treatments ANYTIME
They wish.

Do you funk-nutz have any idea how many
aborted fetuses were being pumped into
Ronnie Raygoon everyday?
Man-O-Day, that is scary, though.
I was 100% SURE that They would be able
to keep Veggie Reagan farting till the
carcass turned 100 years, yet.....They could not!

Meanwhile, on average, 55% of employees whose
jobs are primarily connected with the operation of
American hospitals have NO health insurance.

Meanwhile some moronic toadie readin’ this, and
making six figures a year, will be sending out
Skippy Goebbels reporters to do a story on ‘hospital
workers without health insurance’.

Stay on Groovin’ (DNA Jungle) Safari,
TOR

Meet me in Saint Gooey

2006-07-21T04:15:00.000-07:00

National Guard units were sent into the city of St. Louis
to aid people who have been affected by the near triple digit heat and loss
of electric power.

Guardsman, Captain Tain Cap, said
“We’ins is here to do our job
as good Americans. Today we’ins is handing out cookies and
water and aiding anyone, that needs transport, to a medical faculty.
Tomorrow, if we’ins is ordered to, we’ll bomb the freakin’ crap
outta the same people. We do our job. If we’ins is ordered NOT to do our job it’s our job not to do it.....then, TOO!
Sieg hive!”

General Suekarse added
“If the heat has not abated by this
weekend we have orders to shoot it, shoot it dëad. Sieg hive!”

Stay on Groovin’ Safari,
TOR

The 4th

2006-07-02T18:50:00.000-07:00

What does moi like best 'bout the 4th?

The 5th.

The photo is of Chief Big Foot from the Wounded Knee Slaughter.

Stay on Groovin' (DNA Jungle) Safari,
TOR Hershman

2006-06-27T10:29:00.000-07:00

Moi's lill' "Mary Poppins" parody.

Well, it looks like ole Rush was a done
busted AGAIN and this time for illegal
Viagra.

And I’ve got the nerve to call him
Rash Limp Pa.
Where do I get such CRAZY ideas from?

I’m startin’ to think that ole Rushy likes
them cavity searches.

Stay on Groovin’
(There is nothing more crazy, in a demented CULTure, than
being deliberately sane)
Safari,
TOR