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Wednesday, September 07, 2005

TOR's Living Will

n I, TOR Hershman, being of extremely sound brain, and here and there sound/unsound rest of my body, do declare this to be moi’s legal and public Living Will.

n Firstly, if my body is ever is a state of "Total Brain Death" and the body is being kept alive by the use of technological/mechanical devices I want ALL THE MACHINES LEFT ON!
I want that brainless/lifeless carcass to have every piece of equipment possible
hooked-up to it.
I want the body to be kept defecating, urinating, farting for as LONG AS POSSIBLE.
This would be a tremendous squandering of resources on the planet of worthless existence; just the kind of process that is admired by the moronic members of this culture.
Keep the heart muscle pumping.
Keep the kidneys functioning, no kidding.
Keep the intestines pinching.
Because I WILL NOT be there.
Fly in specialists from Vienna.
Fly in Vienna sausages from Vienna.
Fly in flies, to dine upon the "Meat" when it can no longer be kept producing carbon dioxide, from Vienna.

n Secondly, if I’m in a coma and may come out of it, OPEN THE MORPHINE DRIP 100%.
None of that killing by dehydration/starving.
That is just plain mean, twisted and nasty.

n Thirdly, if I’m in a state of unconsciousness and bodily functions have ceased or will cease without action, DO NOT RESUSCITATE.

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